Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
THE SABOTAGE OF BALDWIN
host prevents Alec Baldwin [real] from tying SNL record; Kelly Ripa cameo
— Quite a random and rare way to start the show, with an entirely pre-taped cold opening. Yet another sign that SNL is moving into the virtual age. Given the fact that this is Steve Martin’s big return to hosting after a 12-year hiatus, along with the fact that this starts with him and Kelly Ripa, of all people, on a date with each other, the pre-taped format of this gives it an epic, special feel that I like.
— Funny touch with the Viagra clock.
— I love Steve’s reaction when hearing that Alec Baldwin is hosting SNL tonight and will tie Steve’s hosting record.
— A funny and very Steve Martin-y bit with the limo and taxi.
— Alec, while looking at himself in a mirror: “It’s your night, big guy. The night we crush that little clown monkey.” Also, immediately after that great one-liner, we get a fantastic tilted shot of the NBC Studios sign (the sixth above screencap for this sketch) that may have possibly been the inspiration for the final shot in the new SNL opening montage that’s introduced the following season (I’ll do a side-by-side comparison shot in my review of the following season’s premiere).
— Always fun to see two (or more) SNL hosting legends appear together in the same sketch.
— Great shot of Steve walking down the SNL halls with Alec tied up in a rug.
— I love the bit with Lorne panickedly saying “We can’t find Alec Baldwin. Somebody call Tom Ha–”, then getting cut off by a punch to the face from a passing-by Steve.
— Solid ending with Steve throwing Alec out of the window onto the Rockefeller Center skating rink.
STARS: ****½
MONOLOGUE
host’s Viagra kicks in while welcoming MAR back from maternity leave
— Some good laughs from Steve constantly correcting himself on the date that the story he’s telling of the first time he hosted took place.
— I love the various photos of Steve with the original cast, comically cropped to only show a very small portion of the cast member in each photo with him.
— Great callback to the Viagra clock from the cold opening.
— Nice way to acknowledge Maya’s return from her maternity leave. It doesn’t feel as odd as I expected it would to see her back, given the fact that she was away for so long that I had forgotten all about her and it felt like she officially left the show, but maybe it doesn’t feel so odd because she’s not playing a character here.
STARS: ***½
A TEDDY BEAR HOLDING A HEART
a teddy bear holding a heart is the minimally-thoughtful Valentine’s gift
— I really like the visual quality of this commercial.
— Hilarious reveal of the “thoughtful” Valentine’s gift being a simple little teddy bear holding a heart, after such a big set-up from the female voice-over. Speaking of the female voice-over, I’m really enjoying her work here. Is that Paula Pell who’s voice I’m hearing?
— Lots of laughs from the many exaggerations this commercial is making.
— Great ending spiel from the voice-over about how this gift is “available literally almost everywhere”, including “I’m guessing wherever you buy milk.”
STARS: ****½
OPRAH
(host)’s memoir is as full of lies as James Frey’s
— Okay, now it feels a little odd to see Maya back, since she’s playing a role here instead of herself.
— I like the quivery-voiced “Oh, my god!” from an unseen Oprah audience member in response to something drastic Maya’s Oprah reveals.
— Funny look for Steve’s character.
— Steve’s constant contradictions about the honesty of his book is pretty funny, and a good use of Steve’s typical delivery.
STARS: ***
DON’T BUY STUFF YOU CANNOT AFFORD
Don’t Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford, says (CHP) to debtors (host) & (AMP)
— Very solid concept, and a great execution and exaggeration of the “complicated” concept of not buying things you can’t afford.
— Great reveal from Chris of the Don’t Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford book being only one page long.
— For some reason, it feels a bit odd hearing Bill do a voice-over at this early stage of his SNL tenure. Maybe it only feels weird because Chris is still on the show.
— I remember MADtv doing a sketch like this a little later. I can’t remember which sketch it is, though, but I remember it being pretty good in its own right. If anyone in the comments section can remind me which sketch it is, thanks in advance.
STARS: ****½
HAMAS PARTY
lucrative gig at Hamas victory celebration creates moral dilemma for host
— Heh, Bill keeps pressing his fake mustache with his hand. Not sure if that’s just an intentional mannerism of his character, or if he’s trying to prevent his fake mustache from peeling off.
— I love Fred’s quivery-voiced emphasis of the word “Israel” when telling Steve about “your well-known hatred of the state of Israel”.
— Fun performances from Fred, Bill, and Seth, but I’m not crazy about this sketch itself.
— Another well-delivered word in this sketch, with the way Bill said “broke-ish”.
— I also love Bill’s delivery just now when quoting Steve’s “Excuuuuuuuuse me” catchphrase before he, Fred, and Seth exit.
STARS: **½
TWO INCHES
(host) & (WLF) converse while standing two inches apart in kissing position
— A good laugh from how the loving way Steve and Will walk up to each other in slow-motion makes you think they’re going to randomly kiss, only for them to just get really close to each other’s faces and hold a normal, friendly conversation.
— A funny unpleasant turn Steve and Will’s conversation takes.
— Our very first Andy Samberg-less Digital Short.
— I’ve seen several online SNL fans over the years say this Digital Short could’ve and should’ve been performed as a live sketch, given that fact that there wasn’t anything about it that required it to be pre-taped. While I certainly don’t mind this as a Digital Short, I can see where those SNL fans are coming from. This indeed would’ve been fun and refreshing as a live sketch. That being said, one thing that this short benefits from by being pre-taped instead of live is the well-done way Will and Steve’s positions are filmed, including the nice camera angles from various distances.
STARS: ***½
QUICK ZOOM THEATER
camcorder-sponsored drama employs unnecessary zooms
— A sketch that seems questionable for the first minute or so, but then halfway through, it suddenly takes a fun turn with all of the (intentionally) botched camera zoom-ins.
— Very funny ending with Steve being forced to run up to and away from the camera when it fails to zoom in on him.
STARS: ***½
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Fury”
WEEKEND UPDATE
— I remember the bit with Amy quickly leaving the Update desk to have an abortion offended one online SNL fan, because they misinterpreted the off-camera sound of Amy’s car taking off for being the sound of Amy actually getting her abortion. Wow.
— This Update is over already??? This is by far one of the shortest Updates in recent memory, and also featured no guests. Certainly no complaints from me regarding SNL’s decision to keep a Fey/Poehler Update very brief and get it the hell out of the way so we can get more sketches. Also, it could be said that this is the last Weekend Update to this day, 14 years later in 2020, to not have ANY guest commentaries, though one could certainly make that argument about the Update from the episode that Maya hosts in 2012, and I’ll explain why when I review it.
STARS: **
SUPER BOWL NATIONAL ANTHEM
Aaron Neville (HOS), Aretha Franklin (KET), Dr. John (JAS) at Super Bowl
— Blah, Horatio’s Aaron Neville has gotten old by this point.
— Kenan In A Dress alert. Oh, and in typical Kenan Thompson fashion, he’s playing this role in the exact same generic sassy manner he plays almost every black woman.
— We at least get Jason as Dr. John, which is a funny impression. I love the voice he’s using here.
— Did Kenan just crack up at his own line just now? Don’t tell me Horatio’s unprofessionalism is rubbing off onto other performers.
— Kenan’s Aretha Franklin requesting a stool to “rest my titties on” is….certainly something.
— I like Jason’s Dr. John returning with a gift that he had just “won and/or stole”.
— Speaking of Horatio’s unprofessionalism, he predictably cracks himself up during his own singing of the national anthem. (*sigh*) Only a handful of episodes left until Horatio is finally the hell out of here.
— Overall, despite a funny performance from Jason, this sketch was fucking terrible.
STARS: *
BACKSTAGE
with Alec Baldwin [real] & JIF on stand-by, LOM trumps (host)’s demands
— A fun idea for a backstage sketch in a Steve Martin-hosted episode.
— Great little detail with Steve wearing his Five-Timers Club robe.
— Funny cutaway to an injured and brain-damaged Alec.
— Random Jimmy Fallon cameo.
STARS: ***½
PRINCE SHOW
Prince’s personal chef (host) & Drew Barrymore (KRW)
— I’ve grown to strongly dislike these sketches, but at least we’ve gotten a long gap between these past two installments. We get an even longer gap between tonight’s installment and the very next one, which is, mercifully, the final one.
— You’d think the only reason they’re doing this sketch tonight is because the real Prince is going to appear in it, but as we know now, he’s nowhere to be seen in the sketch.
— There’s our inevitable instance of Maya and Kristen appearing onscreen together for the very first time. Doesn’t feel as weird to me now as I expected. It sure felt weird to me back in 2006, though.
— Kristen’s doing an absolutely spot-on Drew Barrymore impression, which is even funnier coming just one episode after the real Drew Barrymore made a cameo on Weekend Update.
— There’s the sequence with Fred’s Prince singing into his own mirror reflection, which absolutely seemed like a set-up for a Prince walk-on, but nope. It’s official: they’re just taunting us at this point.
STARS: **
STATE OF THE GALAXY 2145
George Q. Bush’s (WLF) State Of The Galaxy address rings familiar in 2145
— Very fun concept of a futuristic State of the Union, complete with an intro from Brian Williams 3000 and a Chris Matthews hologram.
— Funny line about how, even in the year 2145, they’re still “very close to capturing Osama Bin Laden”, which is even funnier in retrospect, given that tonight’s episode, in 2006, is only five years before Osama actually would be captured.
— Will’s Bush threw in a “We’re workin’ hard” just now. You know those words from Will’s Bush are poison to my ears after that dreadful first Bush/Kerry debate sketch from the preceding season.
— Rachel makes her first appearance ALL NIGHT in a very brief gag at the end of this sketch. The reason for her lack of airtime tonight is because she was sick for most of this week.
STARS: ***½
THE TANGENT
(FRA)’s endless anecdote spans a whirlwind movie career
— Fun to see two Digital Short shorts in the same night, and it gives this Steve Martin episode even more of a special feel.
— Solid format to this short, and there’s some fun cameos.
— Speaking of cameos, Scarlett Johansson’s “cameo” makes it obvious that this short was filmed the then-recent week she hosted SNL (and I believe this short had gotten cut after dress rehearsal from her and Peter Sarsgaard’s respective episode), though even with this short being aired outside of her episode, her appearance blends in well with all the other cameos in this short.
— Conan! And seeing his old Late Night set always makes me feel wistfully nostalgic.
— Chris’ performance and delivery as the movie exec is great. I especially like him, when upset, bluntly telling Fred “This is the problem: your movie ate (*bleep*) at the box office.”
STARS: ****
SURFERS
uncool (host) is incredulous upon learning of his ouster from surfer club
— Oh, no. I recall this sketch being DREADFUL.
— A mild chuckle from Steve asking “Even you, Dragon?” to Jason a second time, just a few seconds after he already asked him that during his whole “Even you, (insert surfer name here)?” sequence. Unfortunately, that’s the only thing I’ve found even remotely amusing in this sketch so far.
— Seth exasperatedly saying “Oh my god” in reaction to Steve’s nonstop questioning matches my attitude during this horribly tedious sketch. This is awful.
— Overall, wow. Even with the aforementioned mild chuckle I got from one part, this was indeed a really bad sketch. Not even Steve could save it. In fact, it made him look really lame as a performer; the kind of lame that reminds me of the claim some people make that Steve has “lost it” as a comedian in his older age, which I only agree with in certain cases, like in those Pink Panther movies. He’s been mostly solid in tonight’s episode.
STARS: *
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest & Tamar [real] perform “Beautiful, Loved & Blessed”
— A noteworthy little moment: Prince humorously ends this performance by saying “Superstah!” while doing the Mary Katherine Gallagher hand gesture.
NATURALLY CRAFTING
(RAD) wants wreathmaker (host) to spend the night
— I remember this being another really bad sketch, but we’ll see.
— At least Rachel still gets a lead role tonight, even in her limited availability this week. You can tell here that she’s indeed still recovering from an illness, as her voice sounds kinda hoarse.
— Good performances from Rachel and Steve, but I’m not caring much for the material itself.
— I did get a laugh just now from Steve hornily asking Rachel “Midge, are those boiled wool mittens?” and Rachel seductively responding “Hand-loomed.”
— Meh, didn’t care for the ending of this.
STARS: **
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— Not as strong as I had remembered, but this was still a pretty enjoyable episode overall. The first half of this episode had quite a number of really great things, but the quality dropped off quite a bit in the second half, especially during the last two sketches. I like how this episode had kind of a special and out-of-the-ordinary feel, which was fitting for Steve Martin’s long-awaited return as a host after 12 years. And Steve was as fun of a host as expected, for the most part.
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Peter Sarsgaard)
a slight step up
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
Natalie Portman