Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
PIERS MORGAN TONIGHT
Lance Armstrong (JAS) doesn’t quite apologize
— Jason is very funny as an unlikable, douchey Lance Armstrong who’s showing no real remorse for his bad actions.
— Bobby is hilarious in his imitation of Manti Te’o’s frequently-seen stunned facial expression while his scandal was going on at this time.
— Kate-as-Jodie-Foster’s opening statement: “I can stretch and kick and stretch and I’m 50!” Uh, okay. Extremely random meta Sally O’Malley reference.
— As usual, Kate’s Jodie Foster is funny, as is her constant coming-out-of-the-closet fake-outs.
— I’m glad Taran has toned down the stammering as Piers Morgan, as he was a little too reliant on that in previous Piers Morgan sketches.
— This overall cold opening felt refreshingly somewhat short, though looking at the length of it right now, it was actually almost 6 minutes long. I wonder why it felt much shorter than that to me.
STARS: ***½
OPENING MONTAGE
— Interestingly, the audience’s applause is mixed in louder during tonight’s opening montage than it usually is in episodes from season 12 and beyond. You can hear a varying round of applause for each cast member and guest announced tonight, which was something I always liked about SNL before season 12, as it gave you an idea of which members of the cast were most popular with the general audience (Eddie Murphy being the most standout example, as the audience would always absolutely ROAR with loud cheers whenever his photo would come up in the opening montage during the 1982-1984 years). The cast members who receive the most applause in tonight’s opening montage are Bill Hader, Taran Killam, Seth Meyers, and Jason Sudeikis, the latter two especially. I’m honestly surprised about Taran, as he’s only in his third season at this time, his first season as a repertory player, and he’s the only one of those four cast members who’s not a veteran.
MONOLOGUE
in advance of the Oscars, host trash-talks fellow Best Actress nominees
— Funny cutaways to Bill as a humorless, stone-faced Tommy Lee Jones, spoofing the reaction that the real Tommy Lee Jones was shown having to a bit that SNL’s own Will Ferrell and Kristen Wiig did together at the then-recent Golden Globes.
— A pretty fun conceit with Jennifer Lawrence trash-talking her fellow Oscar nominees. The actual slams that Jennifer’s delivering towards the nominees aren’t all that funny in themselves, but she’s selling them with her delivery and general demeanor.
— It’s refreshing to finally see a non-musical monologue, after having four straight episodes of them.
STARS: ***
VERISMO
Starbucks’ robobarista Verismo brings coffee & bad customer service home
— Vanessa’s always good at playing characters who smile awkwardly-but-kindly through their uncomfortableness.
— A fairly funny concept, and an accurate spoof of bad customer service at Starbucks.
— I’m not sure how I feel about Cecily doing the voice of what seems to be a stereotypical black character (Verquonica), which I highly doubt she’d do today in 2020.
STARS: ***
GIRLFRIENDS TALK SHOW
new-in-school punk rocker (host) drives a wedge
— This sketch has officially become recurring.
— Jennifer’s good as this typical “edgy”, too-cool-for-the-room teenage girl.
— Ha, I was wondering why Aidy’s wearing that thick motherly-looking coat, which looks odd on what’s supposed to be a teenage character, and now they addressed it.
— I love Aidy’s intentionally-awkward delivery of “Okay, so I do…so…cool it.”
— Another well-delivered Aidy line, with her bitterly telling Jennifer, “You WISH you pooped little pellets!”
— Yet another hilariously-delivered line from Aidy, this time her responding to Jennifer asking her if she’s a cougar by sardonically saying, “Uh, no, I’m not a cougar! Do these human fingers look like paws?!?”
— Overall, this recurring sketch continues to do well, and tonight’s installment thankfully wasn’t much of a carbon copy of the first one. Hopefully, this freshness can continue in subsequent installments.
STARS: ***½
POST HUNGER GAMES NEWS CONFERENCE
Katniss (host) & Peeta (TAK) field questions at postgame press conference
— Tim is very funny during his little part (his first live speaking role in three episodes, by the way).
— Funny bit from Jay.
— Bill’s mere facial expression in that odd-looking beard is cracking me up.
— Ehhh, the joke of a short guy revealing he’s been standing all this time was already used earlier this season in the Katt Williams commentary that Jay did on Weekend Update.
— I love Bobby’s delivery of “When you shave, can I eat your beard?!?”
STARS: ***
MORE HOBBIT
The Hobbit’s tale will be stretched thin during 18 additional movies
— When introducing a clip from the “The elf queen tries to pick an outfit” Hobbit movie, the voice-over announces the title of it as “Hobbit 8”, but the actual title that’s displayed onscreen for that clip says “Hobbit 10”. Very odd.
— Some of the comically-generic, relatable scenarios being used for these Hobbit movies are decent, but some are kinda meh and “whatever”, especially that “For The Longest Time” gag, which is such a cliched gag that I’ve already seen other shows previously do (I think Family Guy was one of them).
— A big laugh from the “S#!t Vision” bit.
— Yikes, a big technical gaffe during the Ikea Dresser scene, where the screen keeps accidentally freezing repeatedly when the punchline of the scene is being delivered, causing the scene to die a sad death by the time the freezing finally stops. It’s simultaneously uncomfortable and humorous hearing the audience’s awkward reactions during this whole technical gaffe. At one point, it sounds like you can even hear an audience member go “Awww” in a deflated manner in reaction to the screen freezing mid-punchline. Also, this whole technical gaffe is kinda reminiscent of the technical gaffe that happened during the Taco Town commercial from the season 31 Jon Heder episode, in which the commercial accidentally got interrupted at one point by a very random exterior shot of a funeral home for a few seconds (which was intended for a sketch airing much later that night).
STARS: **½
JOHNNY TWO TONES
menacing waitress (host) goes beyond charmingly-mean vibe of theme diner
— A laugh from how the required insult that Jennifer’s supposed-to-be charmingly-snarky 1950s waitress says is just a blunt, unenergetic, and uncreative “You’re stupid” and “And I hate you”, and then she just walks away.
— Bobby’s reaction to being told that the water he’s drinking was taken from the toilet is hilarious.
— Some more decently amusing blunt insults from Jennifer’s character.
— Didn’t care much for the “Okay, these are not mashed potatoes” part.
— I love Bill’s upbeat 50s voice.
— This overall sketch felt kinda like it was missing a certain something, but what we got was okay enough.
STARS: ***
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Ho Hey”
WEEKEND UPDATE
all of Anthony Crispino’s showbiz gossip items are in need of correction
— Seth’s punchline about how Mississippi’s stage legislature consists only of “30 hissing possums in a barn” is one of the biggest laughs I’ve gotten from a Seth Meyers Update joke in quite a while.
— Surprisingly, this is the first appearance that Bobby’s reliable Anthony Crispino character has made in what feels like a long while. Maybe it’s a good thing they’re not running this character into the ground and are keeping him fresh.
— Humorously, Anthony Crispino’s “raise the Depp ceiling” punchline receives a genuine “Oof!” from Seth, leading Bobby to admit in character, among some ad-libs he and Seth are making, “That one’s pretty dumb!” So fun seeing him and Seth freely make fun of the quality (or lack thereof) of that “Depp ceiling” joke.
— Crispino’s bit about Lance Armstrong admitting he’s Dopey from Snow White is absolutely hilarious.
— More loose, ad-libby fun during the Crispino commentary, with Bobby and Seth both riffing and imitating each other on how high Bobby’s voice goes when saying “I’m pretty sure.”
— I’m absolutely howling at Crispino imitating Lance Armstrong singing opera while admitting his drug use. Man, tonight’s Crispino commentary is even more of a blast than most of his commentaries usually are, which is saying something.
— There’s that German accent from Seth during an Update joke once again.
STARS: ***½
TOP DOG CHEF
canine cooks create meals from garbage bag ingredients
— Hmm, not too sure about this premise.
— Good part with Jason falling for the doorbell sound that he himself set up, then expressing shame at himself.
— Very funny delivery from Bill of the line “I thought, why not add a little muuuud? Mmmm!”
— I’m very mixed on how I feel about this sketch. I’m still not crazy about it, but I admit the execution is a little better than I expected, at least.
— Bobby’s getting good laughs from his solid delivery of his lines.
— Weak ending.
STARS: **½
B108 FM
intern (host) joins forlorn yet fervid Richard & Buffalo at radio gig
— The second and final appearance of this sketch.
— Bobby has been ALL OVER tonight’s episode. This has got to be one of the busiest nights of his entire SNL tenure.
— Jennifer is certainly a lot more fun here than Lindsay Lohan was in the previous installment of this sketch, and I like the running gag with how badly Jennifer’s promising freestyles always trail off at the end.
— Even though Bobby already said the “Yo, I’m gon’ kill myself!” line in the previous installment of this sketch, it was funnier tonight because of how he said it right before passing out on the floor.
STARS: ***
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Stubborn Love”
DANIELLE
sex pervades flimsy plot of European movie from 1975
— I remember hearing that this is a spoof of a supposedly well-known European(?) porno from the 70s (I think the title is something like “Emmanuelle”), which I’ve never seen. Despite my lack of familiarity with the source material, I’ve always been really fond of this spoof, as it’s very funny on its own.
— Something about Fred’s delivery of “Damn peasant children!” cracked me up.
— The awkwardly-dubbed-in dialogue is cracking me up, especially Jennifer’s odd, wordy lines.
— I love the occasional musical interludes with the “Danielle” theme.
— I got such a big laugh from the random, brief close-up of Bill turning to the camera and simply stating “Danielle” in a deep, poignant, dramatic voice.
— A very funny comically-abrupt ending.
STARS: ****
LOVE LETTERS
soldier’s (TIR) Civil War letters to (host) request she send a tit pic
— This is the first lead role Tim has gotten in months.
— Tim’s character here has a VERY Andy Samberg feel, especially Tim’s gesture and facial expression in the group photo of him having his balls out. I can easily picture Andy doing this sketch if he were still on the show.
— As far as Tim Robinson-starring material goes, I prefer most of the other stuff he has a lead role in this season, especially the more absurdist, oddball, and creative stuff, which is in his wheelhouse, but this sketch is okay, and Tim’s execution of it is fine.
— The Andy Samberg similarities continue, as Tim’s delivery of “Um…are you breaking up with me???” sounded SO Samberg-esque, right down to the raised inflection Tim used when saying the “up with me” portion of that line.
— I love Tim’s sudden “Welp, this is my last breath!”, which he follows by hilariously making a frozen, open-mouthed goofy facial expression as he immediately dies (the second-to-last above screencap for this sketch).
— Great walk-on at the end from Bill as Abraham Lincoln, giving that nice absurdist, oddball, creative feel that I kinda wanted this whole sketch to have.
STARS: ***
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A very average episode, with a forgettable feel and barely anything standing out as particularly strong. At the same time, however, there was barely anything I didn’t like, so it’s hard to complain about this one. At least this keeps up this season’s positive trend of mostly consisting of episodes that range from average to excellent and contain little-to-no segments that I give a rating under three stars to. (That being said, I unfortunately recall the next two episodes being pretty rough. We’ll see if I’ll feel any better about them now.)
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Danielle
Piers Morgan Tonight
Girlfriends Talk Show
Weekend Update
Love Letters
B108 FM
Monologue
Post Hunger Games News Conference
Johnny Two Tones
Verismo
More Hobbit
Top Dog Chef
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Martin Short)
a step down
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
Adam Levine