Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars
A MESSAGE FROM TONY VALLENCOURT
Celtics fan Tony Vallencourt (ADS) relates his memories of Boston Garden
— It makes no sense why this particular average joe character is delivering an address to the nation in a cold opening, nor does it make sense why this particular average joe character is delivering said address from behind a desk in a professional-looking office. He does mention in passing early in this cold opening that this is his sister’s office, but that just seemed like the writers hand-waving their sloppy decision to place this character in an office set.
— There are some funny lines here and there, but the format of this cold opening has gotten boring pretty fast. This cold opening also kinda feels like a sister sketch to Adam’s Gil Graham commentaries from Weekend Update, which makes me now realize that this cold opening would’ve fit more as a Weekend Update commentary. I’m not sure if that would’ve made it funnier, but at least it wouldn’t have been as out of place as it is in the cold opening slot.
— Adam’s delivery is kinda sloppy throughout this.
STARS: **
MONOLOGUE
host enjoys the opportunity to say naughty words & signs an autograph
— Very constant, fast-paced snappy comments from Bob, to a tiresome degree. He can’t go through more than 5 seconds here without making a “witty” aside for every situation. I wouldn’t complain about it if his “witty” asides were actually funny. I’ve never been that big of a fan of his stand-up comedy.
— (*groan*) The “Nipples ass wiener” bit…
— I recall once seeing that monkey-scratching-his-butt-and-sniffing-his-finger video that Bob explains was deemed un-airable for America’s Funniest Home Videos.
STARS: *½
AMAZIN’ LASER
Rerun from 1/21/95
TRACK TEAM
coach of a high school track team (host) reminds his runners to go fast
— Okay, the concept of a coach’s only “insightful” advice to his track team simply being “run fast” is actually fairly funny on paper, but it’s not working AT ALL in its execution.
— This sketch feels like a poor man’s version of the Plucky Ninjas sketch from John Goodman’s season 19 episode.
— Season 20-era Kevin Nealon as a high school track student???
— Ah, now we get a twist that Kevin and the rest of the track team are in their 40s. That’s the first sorta-laugh I’ve gotten during this entire sketch.
— Very lame fourth wall-breaking ending with Bob saying to the camera “Go to commercial FAST!”
STARS: *½
AMERICA’S FUNNIEST HATE VIDEOS
accidental violence from militia & KKK
— I’ve always hated this sketch in the past and considered it emblematic of some of season 20’s problems, but I get the feeling I’m gonna appreciate the sketch more now, especially since I’ve been more lenient on season 20 in my reviews than I used to be in the past.
— The corny laughter from the fake audience is cracking me up.
— Just now, the exploding head footage during the Farley/Spade militia scene absolutely SLAYED me, even though we just got an exploding head gag earlier in the sketch.
— I like the shot of Farley in the audience with a now-headless David.
— There’s yet another sighting of Jay’s real-life arm tattoo of a giraffe(?).
— Interesting twist ending with the show turning out to be a trap to arrest the hate group who wins the contest.
— Overall, my prediction was right: I enjoyed this sketch MUCH more than I did in past viewings. Some pretty good stupidly funny humor here, and a solid ending.
STARS: ***½
DANTÉ
fashion designer (CHF) flamboyantly tells people to leave his office
— It’s just plain surreal and kinda sad to hear Phil Hartman’s voice-over in a new sketch this season (not counting his old voice-overs in old recurring stuff that still appears this season, like Deep Thoughts or Daily Affirmation). The reason for Phil’s voice-over in this sketch is because this sketch originally got cut after dress rehearsal from the preceding season’s Nancy Kerrigan episode. Here’s a GettyImages picture from that cut version of the sketch.
— I’ve been noticing throughout tonight’s sketches that Farley has been sporting A LOT of facial hair. Supposedly, he grew it out for the filming of Almost Heroes, though there would end up being long delays before filming would start.
— A very tepid sketch so far, with the unfunny endlessly repeated gag of Farley ordering people to leave his office while a dramatic music sting plays. How the hell is this supposed to be funny?
— Feels kinda odd seeing Bob Saget in a role like this. In the cut Nancy Kerrigan version of this sketch, McKean (in what was his very first SNL episode) played Bob’s role.
— Overall, not a single laugh from me during this entire sketch.
STARS: *
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Creep”
WEEKEND UPDATE
British Little Girl (MWB) tells how television news happens in America
ELC is devastated because Full House has been cancelled
a clip from recently-deceased Howard Cosell’s appearance on SNL
— I love the audience’s very torn reaction to Norm’s hilariously brutal opening O.J. joke.
— A “Marion Barry loves crack” joke in two consecutive Updates.
— Morwenna Banks getting what would end up being her only character showcase on SNL. I recall hearing that this Little Girl character of hers is one that she was previously known for playing on a show in the U.K.
— For some reason, Morwenna is kinda reminding me a tiny bit of Mike Myers during this commentary. Something about her mannerisms and the British accent.
— Some parts of Morwenna’s commentary are more cute than funny, but I’m getting some good laughs here, and the humor in this commentary is a big change of pace from the usual tone of season 20. This is making me wish Morwenna would’ve been given the chance to showcase more of her style of humor before her insanely short-lived tenure ended.
— Funny concept of Ellen’s commentary, though her exaggerated crying voice is a bit much at times.
— I like Ellen’s line “I don’t remember the day I gave birth to quintuplets” when talking about how she remembers “important” moments in Full House more than she remembers significant events that happened in her own life.
— Bob Saget to Ellen: “Full House will always be in reruns.” Little did Bob know at the time how right he was. Two decades later, Full House still remains insanely popular in syndication, where it has enjoyed a renewed life.
— We get a tribute to the recently-deceased Howard Cosell, with an SNL clip of him in an Ed Grimley sketch from 10 years earlier. I love seeing this again, though a great clip from the fantastic season 10 being shown in the middle of a bad episode from the infamous season 20 is… well, kinda depressing. The classic season 10 clip just emphasizes the sad reality of the then-current state of season 20. Reminds me of how I felt watching a season 3 Mr. Mike sketch being replayed during the particularly awful Sarah Jessica Parker episode from earlier this season.
STARS: ****
KARL’S VIDEO
video store owner Karl bothers host & other customers
— A fairly interesting choice for a sketch to bring back, though I recall this second installment being a huge step down from the solid first one.
— Bob plays himself in this and David’s Karl character gushes over meeting him for the first time, which doesn’t make sense in the universe of this sketch, because in the first installment, Karl brags to Jeff Goldblum about how Bob Saget is a frequent customer and a “big porn freak”.
— Bob to David: “A little WD40 will straighten that creak you got in your throat.” No idea what that even means, but I laughed.
— The constant porn movie jokes throughout this sketch are getting tired.
— Overall, a few laughs, but this was indeed a huge step down from the first installment.
STARS: **
DEEP THOUGHTS BY JACK HANDEY
BOYZ II MEN
Boyz II Men (JAM), (host), (TIM), (ADS) do “I’ll Make Love To You” video
— Two minutes into this sketch, and I’m sitting here staring at my screen wondering what the bloody hell I’m watching. What in the world is the point of this sketch? Where’s the joke? Why are they singing the whole “I’ll Make Love To You” song with no comedic twist? Why are three white guys playing three of the four Boyz II Men members? Is THAT the joke? If so, why isn’t it funny? So many questions, so little laughs.
— The camera mistakenly stayed on Laura WAY too long after her bit was done. Sadly, that technical gaffe is probably the most screentime Laura has gotten in months.
— Yet another technical gaffe at the end, after the sketch fades to black.
— Well…. THAT overall sketch certainly was a colossal waste of my time.
STARS: *
WHERE IN THE WORLD IS SAN DIEGO CALIFORNIA?
too-easy show ends early
— As a 90s kid, this sketch brings back childhood memories of watching Where in the World Is Carmen Sandiego on PBS.
— Tim, Laura, and Michael are pretty funny as Rockapella.
— There’s Molly clearly playing a proto Mary Katherine Gallagher. Feels kinda surreal seeing any hint of Mary Katherine Gallagher in a season 20 episode. That’s such a Ferrell/Oteri-era type of character.
— I like Bob’s frozen facial reaction to Molly’s unexpectedly detailed correct answer of where San Diego is.
— Not a bad premise so far.
— What the hell? What was with the camera cutting back to Ellen not saying anything while looking at the camera with her mouth open, then starting to say something before awkwardly cutting herself off after the camera cuts away from her? Seems to be a lot of gaffes throughout tonight’s episode.
— Overall, the first half of this sketch was fine, but the humor died off towards the end.
STARS: **½
DEEP THOUGHTS BY JACK HANDEY
MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Red Light Special”
DAILY AFFIRMATION WITH STUART SMALLEY
bitter Stuart chides public for not seeing his movie
— Here comes the final Daily Affirmation sketch during Al Franken’s SNL tenure (not counting the surprise return the sketch would later make in the Al Gore-hosted episode from season 28). And, boy, what a famous installment this is.
— Great meta premise, with Stuart Smalley lamenting the fact that his movie is, as he calls it, “a box office disaster”. This premise is a nice change of pace for these Daily Affirmation sketches.
— Stuart to people who didn’t see his movie: “You were too busy getting drunk and beating your kids and cheating on your wife to see my movie!”
— I love the running gag with the various brands of cookies that Stuart’s overeating in his depressed state.
— Stuart, regarding Chessmen cookies: “I eat them, but you can stick them up your ass.” Legendary line.
— Stuart’s out-of-character bitterness here is freakin’ awesome. He is slaying me in this. This is also a nice thinly-veiled way for Al Franken to vent his real-life frustration with the movie’s lack of success.
— Overall, an excellent sketch and a strangely fitting way to end the series of Daily Affirmation sketches. This also felt like a fitting capper to a notorious SNL season, even though we’re still one episode away from the season finale. Now that I say that, I’m finding myself wishing that they saved this sketch for the season finale. This and the famous Polar Bear Cage sketch airing back-to-back would’ve been a great way to end this season. But nah, I’m glad this sketch aired in tonight’s episode instead, because this episode desperately needed a strong sketch.
STARS: *****
PACEMAKER
offputting (DAS) unwisely alienates those who could fix his odd pacemaker
— (*groan*) Yet another season 20 occurrence of David dragging out his shtick of playing snarky pricks, which is so tired and played out by this point of his SNL tenure. In this sketch, he’s coming off particularly tired and unlikable, even if the latter is the point of the character. Either way, it ain’t funny.
— Ugh, this sketch is PURE DEATH so far. What is with this season and horrible sketches taking place in a workshop? First the Mike Myers Fortune Cookie Factory tripe, and now this. It’s reminiscent of how this season keeps relying on terrible sketches dealing with ad execs pitching a commercial at a boardroom meeting.
— Very lame ending involving David’s character doing his snarky shtick on St. Peter. What a waste of Mark McKinney (note to self: get used to it).
STARS: *
DEEP THOUGHTS BY JACK HANDEY
GOODNIGHTS
IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A very rough episode, though not the disaster I remember it being in past viewings (hell, in the very early years of my SNL fandom, I even used to consider this to be the official “Worst. Episode. Ever.”). There were more highlights and okay moments than I had remembered, but they still were far outnumbered by the lowlights, some of which were painfully unfunny. But hey, at least we got an epic farewell installment of Daily Affirmation for the ages.
MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS
HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Courteney Cox)
a fairly big step down
My full set of screencaps for this episode is here
TOMORROW
It’s the end of an era. David Duchovny hosts the final episode of the season, before SNL goes through a major overhaul.