Tag: Gwyneth Paltrow

Posted on

January 15, 2011 – Gwyneth Paltrow / Cee Lo Green (S36 E12)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

EMBRACING CIVILITY
James Carville (BIH) undermines Fox News pundits’ attempt at civility

— They don’t have to throw that “Greta Van Susteren switches from talking out of one corner of her mouth to the other” gag in every one of Kristen’s Greta Van Susteren sketches.
— Good to see Bill’s James Carville making a non-Weekend Update appearance for once.
— I love Bill’s Carville pointing out how Fox News’ attempt at civility is never going to work, then tries to bait them into losing their temper by mentioning things that right-wingers hate.
— Funny involvement of Abby’s Rachel Maddow.
— Wait, that’s it? The cold opening is over just like that? That “ending” was way too abrupt, especially when things were getting more and more interesting. It feels like some last-minute rewrites were made to this.
STARS: ***½


MONOLOGUE
host flubs lyrics in “Islands In The Stream” duet with Kenny Rogers (JAS)

— A laugh from Gwyneth Paltrow mistaking Jason’s Kenny Rogers for Garth Brooks.
— Only a few mild laughs in the Gwyneth Paltrow/Kenny Rogers duet. Otherwise, meh. And it goes without saying how sick I am of this season having so many musical monologues.
— I remember an SNL reviewer back at this time criticizing Kristen’s Dolly Parton impression by saying “That’s not a Dolly Parton impression. That’s Kristen playing Paula Deen again.”
STARS: **


NBC
a slew of clothing-based superhero shows join The Cape on NBC’s schedule

— Ha, I had completely forgotten about NBC’s short-lived The Cape show until now.
— Some decent laughs from the ridiculous clothing-based The Cape-like shows, particularly the Scrunchy one, just for Jason’s facial expression.
STARS: ***


SECRET WORD
Mindy Grayson & socialite (host) ignore game show’s concept

— (*groan*)
— I have absolutely no memory of this episode having a Secret Word sketch. I wonder what kind of character Gwyneth plays.
— “Mindy Elise Grayson”? Why are they now using the middle name of Kristen’s Mindy Grayson character? Why am I supposed to give a fuck about what this annoying recurring character’s middle name is?
— Oh, it turns out I do kinda remember the conceit of Gwyneth’s character making innocent-but-discriminatory comments to her game partner, Kenan.
— Kenan’s asparagus quiz line made me laugh.
— (*sigh*) Cue the obligatory, irritating, redundant, predictable “You just said the secret word” gags.
— Ugh, Kristen’s Mindy Grayson is somehow getting even more annoying than usual right now with her singing loudly in a horrific, annoying voice.
STARS: *½


ANDY AND PEE-WEE’S NIGHT OUT
Pee-Wee Herman [real] & ANS drink shots & go wild; Anderson Cooper cameo

— Pee-Wee Herman! Making his first SNL appearance since 1985!
— A good laugh from Andy and Pee-Wee physically attacking Anderson Cooper, though I can’t help but feel a little bad in hindsight, knowing that this is just a few weeks before Cooper infamously ended up getting physically attacked in real life at Cairo.
— If I didn’t know any better, I’d almost swear that’s John Larroquette as the cop (the fourth-to-last above screencap for this short).
— I love how Pee-Wee’s friends at the intervention are characters from Pee-Wee’s Playhouse. Such a nice blast from the past (as this short in general is).
STARS: ****


BAR MITZVAH
Taylor Swift (host), Jay-Z (JAP), others perform at Jacob’s (VAB) bar mitzvah

— The debut of Vanessa’s Jacob The Bar Mitzvah Boy character. I wonder how many people reading this review are shocked to see that this character debuted in a sketch, especially given the fact that 1) this sketch in general is probably forgotten by most people, and 2) all of Jacob’s subsequent appearances are on Weekend Update, and thus, most people today probably remember him as an Update-only character.
— Hmm, Fred is playing the father of Vanessa’s Jacob character here. Am I correct in remembering that when Billy Crystal would later make a cameo as a Jacob-like character during one of Vanessa’s Jacob commentaries on Update, Billy played Jacob’s father? If so, I guess SNL forgot or ignored the fact that Fred originally played that role.
— An okay premise with famous singers singing a bar mitzvah-themed variant of a hit song of theirs.
— I always love Jay’s scarily-uncanny vocal impression of Jay-Z.
— Nasim Freakin’ Pedrad as Alicia Keys??? Really, SNL? Another sad reminder that this cast doesn’t have a black female cast member, so they have to resort to having their Iranian cast member play a black woman. Unfortunately, this wouldn’t be the last time Nasim would play a black celebrity on SNL. There’s a certain appearance Nasim makes as Nicki Minaj in the following season’s Maya Rudolph-hosted episode that will certainly be…uh, interesting to talk about when I reach that episode.
— Vanessa’s Jacob: “Dad, I told you – I just wanted a modest luncheon!”
STARS: ***


RECORD MEETING
record exec (host) bugs FCC about use of “forget” in musical guest’s hit

— I have very mixed feelings about the concept of this sketch, with fake swear words being used as real swear words. On one hand, there’s a bit of a novelty to it that I kinda like, but on the other hand, there’s a corniness to it that I don’t like. This is also a sketch that, much like the Big Wigs sketch from season 32 and the James-Franco-talking-to-Christmas-trees sketch from season 35, some online SNL fans back at this time negatively said had a very season 6 feel. Not sure I agree with that, though.
— Odd delayed entrance from Paul, causing us to stare at a close-up of a closed door for two awkward seconds before he finally enters through it. This hardly ends up being the last time in his short-lived SNL tenure where he makes a delayed entrance in a sketch.
— Is Cee Lo Green tonight’s co-host? You’d sure think so from all the sketch appearances he’s making.
— I like the bit with everyone else getting mad at Jason when he says “Nintendo” as an N-word substitute.
— Ooh, I love the way this sketch creatively segues into Cee Lo’s SNL musical performance. Extremely rare to see a recent SNL era like this do something THAT clever and out of the ordinary with a musical guest intro. Words cannot express how much of a sucker I am for the rare occurrences of recent SNL eras breaking format.
STARS: *** (this sketch was on its way to getting a **½ rating, but the ending segue alone bumped this up half a star)


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Fuck You” variant


WEEKEND UPDATE
Constitution Corner- SEM questions Founding Fathers’ utility in modernity

presidential hopeful Jimmy McMillan (KET)- “the deficit is too damn high”

VAB interviews Christina Aguilera (NAP), Cher (BIH), Chaz Bono (BOM)

songwriter Kim Castle (host) joins Garth & Kat for winter-related tunes

— An interesting side segment with Seth doing a rant about what it would be like if the Founding Fathers were around today. This feels kinda like something Colin Quinn or Michael Che would do on Update.
— Some pretty good laughs from Seth’s aforementioned Founding Fathers rant, though it ended on a corny note with the fairly cliched bit about how long it takes to load a 1700s musket.
— Oof, Seth’s marble-mouthed delivery of the punchline of his Mark Zuckerberg joke caused it to die with the audience.
— Another Update commentary from Kenan as “The Rent Is Too Damn High” guy? I like Kenan’s impression of him, but doing a second Update commentary with him is kinda pushing it.
— Did…did I just hear Seth pronounce Vanessa Bayer’s last name as “Byer”???
— Ah, a change of pace for this Update era, with Vanessa playing herself as a reporter doing a remote segment away from the Update set.
— Why is Nasim playing Christina Aguilera here? Abby, who’s main identity on SNL is being an impressionist, previously played Aguilera in the Bunny Business sketch from the preceding season and did a passable (though unmemorable) impression of her, so why’d SNL yank the role away from her this week and give it to Nasim? It’s not like Nasim’s doing a better job at the impression. Are they trying to put Abby in as few sketches as possible by this point? This is the second consecutive episode in which she appears very little.
— Ohhhhh, no, no, no, no, no, NO. This transphobic Chaz Bono bit with Bobby has not aged well AT ALL. Sadly, there’s another horribly transphobic bit we’ll be seeing in the very next episode, a certain pre-taped commercial that would end up causing controversy.
— When Vanessa’s remote segment ends, Seth actually pronounces her last name correctly this time, then proceeds to butcher his salutation to her by mistakenly telling her “Thanks you!” instead of “Thank you!” Wow. Why’s Seth so stumbly and mush-mouthed with some of his words tonight? Maybe, after that Founding Fathers rant he did earlier tonight, Seth’s channeling Colin Quinn in more ways than one.
— (*insert a string of furious expletives here to express my reaction to seeing another motherfucking Garth & Kat commentary*)
— The addition of Gwyneth as a third member is doing nothing for my “enjoyment” of this Garth & Kat tripe.
STARS: **


GLOBE THEATRE
modern moviegoing tropes accompany Globe Theater’s Shakespeare previews

— A fun concept of 16th century actors performing live “coming attractions” in the style of modern-day movie previews. Taran’s performance style is perfect for something fun like this.
— I love the little detail of how the squawk sound effect used for Jason’s falcon is the same squawk that was regularly used in Will Forte’s Falconer sketches.
— Mm, not sure how to react to the use of the old hacky “black people yelling at the movie screen” trope. Well, this is making fun of that trope along with other movie theater tropes, so I guess it’s passable.
— Great cutaway to Kenan as a painter getting caught illegally “recording” the play onto his canvas.
— That “False History” twist at the end got another “Mm, not sure how to react to that” response from me. A bit of a weak note to end an otherwise fun sketch on.
STARS: ***½


THE FRESH PRINCE OF BEL-AIR 20TH ANNIVERSARY COLLECTION
Will Smith (JAP) admits to Fresh Prince acting missteps on DVD commentary

— As a 90s kid, I love the idea of SNL doing a Fresh Prince sketch.
— What’s with the cheesy-voiced white guy heard briefly singing the Fresh Prince theme song in the background when Jay’s Will Smith starts speaking in the interview footage? In fact, the cheesy-voiced white guy singing sounds like Andy. I take it music licensing issues prevented SNL from using the actual Will Smith-sung Fresh Prince theme song?
— A big laugh from Jay-as-Will’s “Aroo?” reaction into the camera when Kenan’s Carlton somberly reveals he was molested.
— Another reminder of SNL’s low number of black cast members this season, as it feels odd seeing Will and Carlton as the only Fresh Prince characters portrayed in a Fresh Prince sketch. Couldn’t they have at least had Kenan doing double-duty by playing Carlton in an early scene and then Uncle Phil in a later scene? (After all, Kenan would later play Uncle Phil in a great Fresh Prince pre-tape SNL does with Chris Redd in a Jessica Chastain-hosted episode from 2018.) I was about to say “Maybe there wouldn’t have been enough time for Kenan to make such a costume change in a live sketch”, but then I remembered Maya Rudolph previously managed to play both Thelma and Willona at two different points of a live Good Times sketch from the season 29 Janet Jackson episode.
— Some laughs from the various inappropriate “Will Reacts” choices Jay’s Will makes at the end of each clip.
STARS: ***


ESPN DEPORTES
Latin anchors anglicize USA proper nouns & phrases

for Tres Equis cerveza, the extra X means “mas fun”

— Ah, a showcase for the underused Paul Brittain! It’s about time.
— Very funny delivery from Paul when his Hispanic character says occasional English words in an exaggerated American voice. I particularly love his exclamation of “Pop goes the weasel!”
— Jay’s been getting a lot more airtime tonight than he usually gets this season.
— A fun silly, hammy appearance from Bobby at the end of the Tres Equis commercial.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Bright Lights Bigger City”


SPITZER AUDITIONS
Eliot Spitzer (BIH) auditions potential replacements for Kathleen Parker

— I always crack up at Bill’s Eliot Spitzer voice, even if he does overuse that deep-voiced dopey laugh. Also, is it odd that I usually hear a little bit of Phil Hartman’s Frank Sinatra in Bill’s Spitzer voice?
— During the bit with Gwyneth’s Heidi Klum repeatedly saying “in and out”, I like Bill’s Spitzer saying “I’m about to say something awful, you should go!”
— The David Paterson twist at the end is making me laugh, and I can’t help but always be a sucker for the pairing of him and Bill’s Spitzer.
STARS: ***


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— An average episode. Barely anything stood out as strong, but most of the episode was pretty good, especially the post-Weekend Update half, which had a consistent quality to it.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


RATED SEGMENTS RANKED FROM BEST TO WORST
Andy and Pee-Wee’s Night Out
Globe Theatre
Embracing Civility
ESPN Deportes
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air 20th Anniversary Collection
Spitzer Auditions
NBC
Bar Mitzvah
Record Meeting
Weekend Update
Monologue
Secret Word


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Jim Carrey)
a slight step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Jesse Eisenberg

Posted on

November 10, 2001 – Gwyneth Paltrow / Ryan Adams (S27 E5)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

PRESIDENTIAL ADDRESS
George W. Bush (WIF) quells Muslims’ misgivings by dispelling some myths

— Good touch with the Arabic subtitles. This reminds me of an address-the-nation cold opening that Dana Carvey once did as Bush Sr. that also used Arabic subtitles, directed to the Iraqis.
— A pretty funny line with Bush mentioning “former Minnesota Vikings receiver Ahmad Rashad” as an example of how many prominent Americans are Muslim.
— Some good laughs from Bush’s debunking of various myths, particularly the whole bit about dying if you burp, fart, and sneeze at the same time.
— A nice alteration of the “Live from New York…” sign-on, with Will’s Bush delivering it in Arabic. Speaking of which, this entire cold opening would later be replaced with the dress rehearsal version in reruns, and it has Will’s Bush saying “Live from New York…” in plain old English instead of Arabic. Some SNL episode guides incorrectly claim that reruns show the live version of this episode’s cold opening, but just re-dub Will’s Arabic LFNY with an English one.
STARS: ***½


OPENING MONTAGE
— In addition to the cold opening, the theme music would also be replaced with the dress version in reruns. I’m not sure, but I think the following monologue would be too (if not, then I’m probably thinking of the Boston Teens sketch that follows the monologue).


MONOLOGUE
host & overshadowed childhood friend MAR sing “Flashdance”

— Nice how Gwyneth Paltrow is bringing out her best friend since childhood who also happens to also be a member of the then-current SNL cast.
— Fun to see childhood pictures of Maya and Gwyneth together.
— Some amusing awkwardness between Maya and Gwyneth after Maya excitedly says “It’s almost like I’m hosting with you!”
— Funny running gag with Maya turning out to have always played a maid.
— I remember how rare it felt at the time to see Maya get such a big showcase as herself, since she had rarely played any roles on SNL that were remotely like herself up to that point, and I had yet to see her interviewed on talk shows.
— Quite a lot of genuine charm in this monologue, even though this isn’t consistently laugh out loud funny.
STARS: ***


FORMAL
at the fall formal, Sully scoffs at Denise’s friend’s (host) troubles

— After the preceding monologue ended, we got a cool transition to this sketch by the camera panning from the monologue to the set for this sketch. Reminiscent of what SNL did after the monologue in season 25’s Christina Ricci episode.
— An interesting setting for the Boston Teens, and a rare occurrence of us not seeing them in their usual outfits.
— Funny bit about vodka-soaked hot dog buns.
— Something about Gwyneth’s performance seems kinda off.
— I remember Tina’s appearance in this came as a big surprise to a lot of us viewers back then, as it was still very rare at the time for Tina to make a non-Update appearance in which she plays a character. It’s also interesting seeing her appear in this sketch knowing that she co-writes these sketches with Rachel and originally performed the Boston Teens with Rachel back in their pre-SNL improv days.
STARS: ***


GEMINI’S TWIN WEEKEND
Gemini’s Twin & newest member (host) ride the wave of USA patriotism

— Pretty funny CD cover for Gemini’s Twin’s “America The Bootyful”.
— In these last two installments, I’ve gotten pretty tired of this sketch.
— I will say that Ana’s voice and delivery as this character always makes me laugh.
— Gwyneth is at least fitting in much better with Maya and Ana than Jennifer Lopez did in the last Gemini’s Twin sketch to have a host play a third member of the group.
STARS: **½


BIRTHDAY PARTY
Mrs. Attebury is insensitive toward man of Middle Eastern heritage (CHK)

— This on-again off-again recurring sketch makes its final appearance. Interesting how this sketch has only been performed 4 times, yet still managed to span over Ana’s entire SNL tenure, appearing from her first season to her last.
— In passing, Gwyneth’s character mentions someone named Charlie McKittrick and his wife. This is actually an inside self-reference on Ana’s part (assuming she wrote this sketch herself), as Charlie McKittrick is the name of her real-life husband. Ana also namedropped him in a Culps sketch from two seasons prior.
— Will’s deadpan performances as this character, while okay, continue to not work for me nearly as well as Mark McKinney’s original performances as this character did.
— A good laugh from Ana and Gwyneth telling Chris’ character that, as a Persian-American, he must not know who to root for in this war on terror.
— Lots of other funny inappropriate, insensitive questions and statements that Chris’ character is bombarded with by Ana and Gwyneth’s characters.
— Over the course of me reviewing this late 90s/early 00s era, these Attebury’s sketches have really grown on me gradually. I remember kinda slamming the first installment of this sketch, only for me to end up gaining more and more of an appreciation for both Ana’s characterization and what these sketches bring with each passing installment.
STARS: ***½


TV FUNHOUSE
by RBS- Michael Jackson’s entourage tries to curb his pedophilic habits

— Speaking of an on-again off-again recurring piece that first appeared in Ana’s first season (season 22) and spans over many seasons…
— A hilarious bizarre group of friends that MJ is casually shown with. I especially like a bloated, mumbling, overeating Marlon Brando, a gray-bearded Webster, and Liz Taylor’s arm.
— I always love the tastelessness of these Michael Jackson cartoons, as well as the spoof of classic Hanna-Barbera animation that these contain. I am feeling, though, that tonight’s cartoon, while still solid, isn’t quite as strong as the last Michael Jackson cartoon that Robert Smigel did years prior.
— Uh, wow. Quite an ending to this, with MJ landing butt-first on a flagpole, and it curing him of his pedophilic tendencies.
— This cartoon would later be removed from the NBC reruns of this episode and be replaced with a previously-unaired unrelated TV Funhouse cartoon that I assume was cut after another episode’s dress rehearsal.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “New York, New York”


WEEKEND UPDATE
TIF offers a pizza party to the first airport guard to catch a terrorist

defiant Rudolph Giuliani (DAH) declares himself NYC mayor-for-life

Jasper Hahn completes drawings related to the war against terrorism

— A solid and fun Jimmy/Tina side segment with their Pizza Party Against Terrorism announcement.
— I always crack up whenever Darrell’s Rudy Giuliani says “Go Yankeeeees!” in a dopey deep voice.
— Kinda interesting in retrospect seeing Michael Bloomberg being referenced and impersonated back when he wasn’t very well-known yet.
— A nice callback to the “Neuharth Awards” bit that Jimmy and Tina originally did in an episode a year prior. They seem to be trying to make this an annual routine whenever the Neuharth Awards occur, but I believe this ends up being the last time this routine appears on the show.
— Our first time seeing Jasper Hahn since the Colin Quinn era of Update.
— Jimmy’s not believable at all as an uptight straight man to Jasper Hahn, because you just KNOW this is going to soon devolve into the usual Fallon/Sanz gigglefest.
— Dammit, the poor visual quality of the old VHS rip I’m reviewing of this episode makes it very hard to see Jasper Hahn’s obscene drawings (as evidenced in the above screencaps).
— Yep, and there’s goes the obligatory Fallon/Sanz giggling and hammy overacting.
STARS: ***½


DYSFUNCTIONAL FAMILY DINNER
at dinnertime, gangsta-wannabe daughter (AMP) vexes irritable patriarch

— The first installment of this sketch with Sarah Michelle Gellar is fantastic and an all-time favorite of mine, but did they really need to bring it back? And FOUR SEASONS LATER at that??? Speaking of which, it’s odd how tonight’s episode is bringing back so many sketches that either appear very infrequently and/or last appeared years prior (The Attebury’s, Michael Jackson cartoon, Jasper Hahn, and now this).
— Yeah, so far, this sketch is paling horribly in comparison to the original installment. They’re even having Will yell inferior variations of his classic “I DRIVE A DODGE STRATUS!” line from the first installment.
— Just now, when Gwyneth said “Shut up, biotch”, she actually sang the word “biotch”. Very random, but absolutely priceless. Unfortunately, the version of this sketch that a lot of people nowadays are probably familiar with seeing (especially in SNL’s Thanksgiving compilation specials) is actually the dress rehearsal version, in which Gwyneth doesn’t sing the word “biotch”, but instead just says it normally, which is nowhere near as funny. Also, this makes me wonder if her singing “biotch” in the live version was an ad-lib. None of the other performers are seen smirking in response or anything, but then again, Will and Ana are usually always total pros.
— By the way, as you can tell by how many alterations I’ve pointed out this episode having in reruns, this is quite a heavily-altered episode in reruns. There are more dress rehearsal substitutions than usual, and there’s the whole thing with the Michael Jackson TV Funhouse cartoon being replaced with a completely different cartoon.
— Another difference between the live and dress rehearsal version of this Dysfunctional Family Dinner sketch is that, in the dress version, whenever the family argues over each other, Gwyneth oddly does her yelling DIRECTLY AT THE CAMERA, in an apparent attempt to be funny.
— Overall, yeah, SNL should’ve just left the original Sarah Michelle Gellar-starring Dysfunctional Family Dinner sketch alone. This attempt at a sequel was just sad, in my eyes.
STARS: **


MANGO
Mango & high school sweetie host recall “Summer Nights”; Matt Damon cameo

— Right out of the gate in this sketch, we get an absolutely SPOT-ON and very funny Hugh Grant impression from Seth. He even looks just like him here. Between his heavy dominance and strong performances in the preceding episode and now his Hugh Grant impression tonight, Seth has been showing A LOT of promise lately. I remember having so much hope for him at the time. This makes me sad in retrospect, knowing what his SNL tenure would actually go on to be like (hint: I am not too big a fan of a lot of stuff he would go on to do on the show).
— (*groan*) And here comes Mango.
— During Gwyneth’s 80s high school flashback, I wonder if Maya is supposed to be playing herself as Gwyneth’s friend, given that we know Maya and Gwyneth were real-life childhood friends.
— During the many 80s pop culture references in Gwyneth and Maya’s conversation in the aforementioned 80s high school flashback, what was with the Crystal Pepsi mention? Wasn’t Crystal Pepsi not around until the early 90s?
— Jeff makes his ONLY appearance of the entire night in a pre-taped scene, and all he did was briefly walk on with some other guys and then IMMEDIATELY walk off, not having any dialogue at all. This is the second episode in a row in which he had no lines.
— Speaking of cast members who have been invisible these last two episodes, Tracy Morgan. Also, he’s been stuck in nothing but effeminate roles these last two episodes, oddly enough.
— Yikes, Gwyneth completely missed her cue to sing her first verse during her duet with Mango, a gaffe that’s sadly far more interesting and funny to me than most of this sketch.
— Ana has been getting good airtime tonight, which is very refreshing, considering the big decrease in airtime she had been experiencing this season.
— Ana: “Let’s go, Lavert.” “Will: “Okay, Gwyneth’s agent.”
— Matt Damon cameo.
— Matt Damon’s getting some chuckles out of me here. You can already see some of the solid potential that he would later show when hosting in season 28. (I don’t know how he did in his season 44 episode, as I have yet to see it, but I’m assuming he did another good hosting job there.)
— Funny bit with Matt and Gwyneth acknowledging that this is the first time they’ve seen each other since they broke up, before Gwyneth goes “Wait a minute, you’re not the one I went out with!” Great way to end this sketch. Odd how this Mango sketch had such a strong beginning (with Seth’s Hugh Grant impression) and ending, but everything in between was the usual weak Mango dreck.
STARS: **


FIESTA POLITICA
Donald Rumsfeld (DAH) is out of place at Telemundo show

— Believe it or not, this is the FIRST and ONLY non-recurring sketch to appear all night… at least at the time this episode originally aired. This sketch would later become recurring, which means that, when looking back at this episode in retrospect, this episode is comprised ENTIRELY of recurring sketches. The Rosie O’Donnell episode from season 22 is, I believe, the only episode in SNL history to be comprised entirely of sketches that were already recurring at the time.
— Maya has been a little more dominant than usual in tonight’s episode, for obvious reasons.
— A spot-on and and amusing parody of wacky Telemundo variety shows, and Maya is leading this sketch well.
— I like the out-of-place inclusion of Darrell’s Donald Rumsfeld, who has no idea what the hell he’s doing here.
— Tracy’s streak of playing nothing but effeminate roles these last two episodes continues. What’s going on?
— Despite being an excuse for mugging, the occasional cutaways to an extreme close-up of Horatio’s face saying a one-liner are making me laugh in this particular context, as it fits the sketch well.
STARS: ***


MY BIG THICK NOVEL BY JACK HANDEY
mauled by a lion in chapter 507


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— An okay episode, but not particularly great. The quality took a hit with the first few post-Weekend Update sketches (Dysfunctional Family Dinner and Mango), but other than that, the quality was just decent for most of the night. It rarely rose above that, though. Aside from TV Funhouse, there weren’t any segments at all that I gave a rating over three-and-a-half stars to.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (John Goodman)
a step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Billy Bob Thornton

Posted on

February 6, 1999 – Gwyneth Paltrow / Barenaked Ladies (S24 E12)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

NO GLOATING
supposed good sport Bill Clinton (DAH) gloats about beating impeachers

— Ah, “I will not gloat”. A famous and memorable Clinton cold opening.
— I love Darrell-as-Clinton’s sarcasm over getting impeached by an entire “house” of representatives.
— A good laugh from a picture of a horse’s ass “accidentally” being used to represent Henry Hyde.
— A particularly great part with Tracy’s Betty Currie doing a slow gloating dance to Aretha Franklin’s “Chain of Fools”.
— A cool change-up to the “Live from New York…” sign-on, with Darrell’s Clinton saying “Live from New York, it’s gloatin’ time!”
STARS: ****½


MONOLOGUE
Ben Affleck [real] asks host to stop pretending she’s English

— Already a good start with Gwyneth immediately speaking casually with a phony English accent as if it’s normal for her.
— Ben Affleck cameo. Nice to see this in retrospect, knowing what a great recurring SNL host he would later be. (His first hosting stint is the following season.)
— I liked English Gwyneth’s little line about “humorous” being spelled with an “o-u-r”.
— Right in this very first SNL appearance of his, Ben Affleck is coming off very solid, especially his mention of his and Gwyneth’s recent breakup. Now that I’m aware that this monologue is shortly after their breakup, this shows what great sports both Gwyneth and Ben are to perform with each other in this.
— Another great line from Ben to Gwyneth: “Don’t go all Minnie Driver on me, okay?”
STARS: ****


IMPEACHMENT COVERAGE
E! offers awards show-style coverage of the Clinton impeachment trial

— A very funny concept of a typical E! red carpet special being done for the Impeachment Trial, of all things.
— Gwyneth is funny as Sharon Stone, especially her “Isn’t he creepy?” line about her new husband. This Sharon Stone impression is also kinda infamous, as the real Sharon Stone would publicly complain about how offended she was by it, especially the aforementioned “Isn’t he creepy?” line.
— Speaking of celebrity impressions that famously pissed off the real person, Kattan’s Andy Dick always amuses me.
— WTF? Tim as Betty Currie? Didn’t we just see Tracy playing her earlier tonight in the cold opening? Is SNL going for a season 10 Doug Henning thing here (where Martin Short and Rich Hall each played Doug Henning in a separate sketch in the same episode)?
— I really like the random apocalyptic ending.
STARS: ****


VH1
Behind The Music- Joan Jett (host) recalls “I Love Rock n’ Roll”

— This is the first of several pre-taped black-and-white VH1 Behind the Music mini-sketches that we’ll be seeing this season (especially in tonight’s episode).
— Another strong and funny performance from Gwyneth tonight, and she’s really making this sketch.
STARS: ****


BLACK ANGELS
Mary Katherine Gallagher proves tougher than her all-girl gang initiators

   

— One of the more famous Mary Katherine Gallagher sketches, which is impressive, considering the character is nearing the end of her run at this point and it seemed like she had been running out of steam before this.
— I like MKG’s line about making her decision to be a bad girl after seeing “The Patty Hearst Story”.
— Some laughs from the disgusting loud water-lapping sounds being heard when MKG is off-camera drinking water out of a toilet.
— A classic part with MKG telling Paula Pell’s nun character “I bet you have a real hairy ass”, followed by her literally barking at the nun.
— Another classic part, with MKG’s pratfall through the bathroom stalls, complete with water spraying out of a pipe from the wall. Easily my favorite MKG pratfall of all time. An interesting behind-the-scenes tidbit about this portion of the sketch is that Molly actually injured the back of her head when she was repeatedly throwing herself backwards onto the knocked-down bathroom stall walls while repeatedly yelling “I’ll kill ya!” at the camera. Like a trouper, Molly continues on with the sketch without missing a beat and without showing any signs of pain, but after this sketch ends, she spends the remainder of tonight’s episode with an ice pack pressed against the back of her head whenever she’s not onstage.
— Overall, this gets my vote for best Mary Katherine Gallagher sketch.
STARS: ****


VH1
Behind The Music- John Oates (CHK) came up with “Private Eyes” claps

— Short and funny, though not as strong as the Joan Jett one from earlier tonight.
STARS: ***½


MINDY & SKY
dumb girlfriend (host) ruins musician’s (JIF) act but is too sexy to drop

— A lot of laughs from the misinformed statements and bad songs that Gwyneth’s dumb hippie character is making throughout the sketch.
— Gwyneth’s “Rainforests are the devil” song is particularly hilarious.
STARS: ****


TV FUNHOUSE
“X-Presidents” by RBS- impeachment spurs a rampage by the Constitution

 

— Funny visual of the Constitution coming alive and randomly eating people’s midsection, exposing their skeleton.
— A particularly shocking and hilarious part with Strom Thurmond gleefully telling a black senator, after the Emancipation Proclamation gets destroyed, “Whoo-hee, you’re mine, boy!” and trying to chain him. SNL’s studio audience can be heard groaning LOUDLY at that. Haha, gotta love Robert Smigel for daring to go places that SNL usually wouldn’t dream of.
— A great Iran/Contra scandal throwback reference, with Reagan and Bush destroying the monstrous Constitution by using a move that they call the “Ollie North”, which involves shredding the paper.
— Overall, one of the stronger X President cartoons.
STARS: ****


STATEN ISLAND NURSES
(host) & (CHO) socialize amidst medical drama

— This is one of the first SNL episodes I ever saw, and when this sketch came on during that viewing of mine, not knowing who was hosting this episode, I honestly mistook Gwyneth for Fran Drescher, considering the Nanny-esque way Gwyneth looked in that wig along with the New York accent she was doing (though she’s not doing a nasal voice like The Nanny).
— I’m iffy on this sketch, as the material feels a little on the weak side, but Cheri and especially Gwyneth’s performances are decent.
— I love Darrell’s line regarding two breast implants he’s holding in his hand: “I gotta go put these in some broad’s rack!”
STARS: **½


E!
Trent Lott (DAH) says “You’re Watching E!”

— Well… this overall bit was certainly random. Not to mention VERY short and straightforward, with Darrell’s Trent Lott impression from tonight’s earlier E! Impeachment Coverage sketch just saying into the camera “I’m Trent Lott, and you’re watching E!.” That’s it. That’s literally the ENTIRE sketch. I guess it’s kinda funny that Trent Lott, of all people, would do one of those brief “I’m (insert name here), and you’re watching E!” ads that celebrities would often do on E! in this era (Comedy Central also had ads like that in this same era), and maybe SNL’s just going for added realism here, after having done a full-length E! sketch earlier tonight.
— What’s with SNL’s heavy VH1 and E! focus in tonight’s episode, anyway?
— Hell, my review of this sketch is about four times as long as the sketch itself was.
STARS: N/A (too brief and material-less to give a rating to)


WEEKEND UPDATE
multitalented beltway insider Vernon Jordan (TIM) sings about himself

— For the first time all season, a Weekend Update doesn’t precede its opening title sequence with Colin standing in front of the Update desk and doing a straight-to-camera rant. I think that aspect of Colin’s Updates is officially gone by this point, but I can’t say for sure until I review the next episode.
— Boy, is Colin’s delivery awkward on some jokes so far tonight, even moreso than usual. Some of his jokes are bombing badly tonight too (which Colin, of course, responds to by comically scolding the audience for not laughing).
— Some pretty strong jokes from Colin tonight are somewhat balancing out the clunkers. A wildly hit-and-miss Update from Colin.
— Man, the graphics department sure screwed up Colin’s Eugene Robinson joke, by accidentally putting up an unrelated picture of Cher and a young black boy on the Update news screen (intended for Colin’s next joke), resulting in an understandably confused audience (and me).
— A very random musical turn during Tim’s Vernon Jordan commentary, but Tim is giving it that usual Tim Meadows charm that I always love.
— Now the Vernon Jordan commentary is getting even more random and extensive, with the use of Horatio, Ana, Molly, and Parnell as old-timey singers.
— I’m howling at the goofy open-mouthed smile on Tim’s face in the background when looking at the camera while doing a slow leg-kicking dance behind the singers (the last above screencap for this Weekend Update).
STARS: **½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “It’s All Been Done”


DOING VOICES
(WIF)’s fiancee Margaret Healey (MOS) & her family love the jokey accents

— I wasn’t caring too much for this at first, until Ana started joining in on the ladies’ jokey accent gimmick by using a Southern belle voice. Not sure why Ana’s making this jokey accent gimmick work for me, but she is.
— Will is a funny straight man in this, and is now providing my real laughs in this.
— I recall an old SNL review from 1999 pointing out how much Horatio, in that wig and glasses, resembled John Belushi.
— A much-needed hilarious turn at the end with Horatio’s warning to Will.
— Nice touch at the very end with Horatio softly beginning to suffocate himself with a pillow.
STARS: ***


VH1
Behind The Music- Colin Hay (JIF) gets lost in “Who Can It Be Now”

— Knowing Jimmy’s love for 80s hit songs, he’s perfectly cast in this role of Colin Hay getting lost in his own bad reminiscent singing of some lyrics from “Who Can It Be Now”.
— Hmm, I’m not finding myself laughing much here. This piece is coming off pretty weak.
— The sketch-ending audience applause seemed to drown out whatever Jimmy’s final line was.
STARS: **


BIOGRAPHY
bitter over being ousted, Jack Perkins (DAH) tars Harry Smith

— A change of pace for these Biography sketches.
— I love the idea of Darrell’s recently-fired Jack Perkins bitterly doing a slanderous biography on his replacement, Harry Smith. The false info this biography is giving about Smith’s life is hilarious.
— A very funny scene with Darrell’s Perkins himself doing a re-enactment of Harry Smith supposedly murdering Bob Crane.
— Random walk-on from Gwyneth as Perkins’ new Inuit wife.
STARS: ****


SENATE VOTING
William Rehnquist (WIF) tires of partisan voting during impeachment trial

— Hmm, I have absolutely no memory of this sketch from my previous viewings of this episode.
— Darrell’s Trent Lott impression is getting a real workout tonight, appearing in THREE sketches in the same episode.
— The increasingly irrelevant things the senate is taking votes on are providing some laughs.
STARS: ***


HARDCORE ROCK
host endorses album of porn movie soundtrack music

— A funny turn early on with Gwyneth casually revealing how much she loves watching hardcore porn.
— Some good laughs from the way Gwyneth is nonchalantly reading off the various dirty porn titles that are displayed on the bottom of the screen, though you can tell she almost started cracking up at one very brief point.
— Overall, short and sweet.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A strong episode. The first half was especially great, with a lot of very solid and memorable sketches receiving a high rating from me. Gwyneth Paltrow impressed me with her very good performances all throughout this episode. I don’t recall her following two hosting performances (from 2001 and 2011) being anything special, but just based on her hosting performance in tonight’s episode, she definitely deserved to be brought back for a second hosting stint.


MY PERSONAL CHOICE OF “BEST OF” MOMENTS FOR THIS EPISODE, REPRESENTED WITH SCREENCAPS


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (James Van Der Beek)
a mild step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Brendan Fraser