Tag: Kathleen Turner

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October 21, 1989 – Kathleen Turner / Billy Joel (S15 E3)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

COLD OPENING
The Miracle Of Fatima ’89- American flag tells (host) “don’t burn me”

— I liked the random “Art Squad” opening credits featuring Jesse Helms (played by an extra) shooting the genitalia off a David statue. No idea what news story that was based on, though.
— Kind of a strange cold opening so far. Not too crazy about what I’ve been seeing here.
— Yeah, this hasn’t been working for me at all. It’s being well-performed, but hasn’t been funny nor interesting to me. Easily one of my least favorite cold openings from this entire era.
STARS: *½


OPENING MONTAGE
— Mike Myers’ pic has been changed from a fairly plain-looking one to a more professional, mature-looking one.


MONOLOGUE
host actually talks like VIJ- the sexy voice is just for movies

— Hilarious bit with Kathleen revealing her “real” voice, which is just her miming to Victoria Jackson’s naturally high-pitched voice-over.
— Kathleen is displaying great timing with her lip-syncing of Victoria’s voice-over and the way she’s able to seamlessly go back-and-forth between miming the voice-over and speaking in her own famously husky voice.
— I wonder if the rerun version I’m watching uses the dress rehearsal version of this monologue. I ask because at the end of this, I noticed an abrupt cut in Kathleen’s positioning when the camera switched from a close shot of her to a wide shot of the stage as the SNL Band plays the show to commercial. Perhaps in the original live version of this monologue, Kathleen’s lip-syncing was a bit too sloppy.
STARS: ****


PLUG AWAY WITH HARVEY FIERSTEIN
John Travolta (DAC), host, Lee Iacocca (PHH) promote selves

— I loved Dana-as-Travolta’s way of pronouncing “Look Who’s TAAAAHLKIN’”.
— Very interesting part with Kathleen trying to seduce Jon’s Fierstein.
— I always like Phil’s Lee Iaccoca voice.
— Funny part where, as soon as Merv Griffin is mentioned, Jon’s Fierstein looks dreamily into space while longingly saying “Merv….”
— The “gay bee” back-and-forth between Fierstein and a confused Iaccoca is a really funny part that I’ve always remembered fondly about this sketch.
STARS: ***½


DIE SQUAREN OST BERLINER
celebrity defections make game difficult
Donheiser (DAC)- German Donahue’s audience has defected to the west

— Funny concept of a foreign Hollywood Squares, with all the dialogue being delivered in German.
— A good laugh from how most of the celebrity guests are missing because they’ve defected.
— Nice use of Billy Joel.
— We even get to hear Don Pardo speaking in German.
— I’m enjoying Mike’s voice in this.
— It’s pretty amusing trying to figure out what everybody in the sketch is saying.
— Good bit with Jan being caught on her way out, complete with a suitcase.
— I love the mid-sketch commercial with Dana as an angry German version of Donahue.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “We Didn’t Start The Fire”


WEEKEND UPDATE
one-man mobile uplink unit ALF gives drug war report from NYC crackhouse
PHH gives George Steinbrenner Health Watch update for hopeful Yankee fans
AWB says that the San Francisco earthquake is not the end of the world

 

— First time we’ve seen One Man Mobile Uplink Unit Al Franken in a long time. He completely skipped season 14, for some reason. I like how he’s reporting from a crackhouse tonight.
— Hmm, Uplink Unit Al even addresses the fact that we haven’t seen him in a while, and explains that the reason for his long absence is because he was addicted to pain pills (due to the strain of carrying all of that heavy mobile equipment).
— It might just be me, but the picture they showed of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh (screencap below) kinda resembles future cast member Rob Schneider in Arab make-up.

Speaking of Rob Schneider, he joins the writing staff later this season and we’ll be seeing him (as well as his fellow added-to-the-writing-staff-later-this-season writer David Spade) appearing in lots of uncredited bit roles in the homestretch of this season, before eventually being added to the cast at some point next season.
— After just one episode, we already get a follow-up to the George Steinbrenner Health Watch segment.
— Despite the fact that Phil’s still playing himself like he did in the last Steinbrenner Health Watch installment, he’s wearing a rather strange wig this time for some reason.
— Some good laughs from Phil’s detailing of Steinbrenner’s mundane health issues, especially him saying “Sadly, the blood did clot” regarding Steinbrenner cutting himself shaving.
— Dennis’ stern “Beauty And The Beast is not real; it’s just a TV show” rant to Beauty And The Beast fans was decent. I half-expected him to deliver a William Shatner-esque “Get a life!” at one point.
— Loved Dennis’ joke about a Tone Loc-ness Monster.
— A mention of the notorious then-recent massive San Francisco earthquake that infamously interrupted that year’s World Series.
— A. Whitney, on how the Cubs’ failure to win the pennant means the world is not ending: “It’s in the bible: when the small bears from the Windy Place take the flag, THEN you shall know the end is nigh.”
— An overall short and sweet commentary from A. Whitney.
STARS: ***½


EGG MAN
an ovum confidant (PHH) counsels (host) about her wild son (DAC)

— I like the bizarre concept of this, and we get a very funny visual of Phil as a glasses-wearing talking egg.
— A good laugh from Egg Man’s panicky reaction to being manhandled by Kathleen during her angry rant.
— Egg Man giving noble advice is pretty funny.
— Dana’s giving an amusing performance as the wild punk-ish son.
— A few seasons later, SNL would do a sketch with Chris Farley as an advice-giving bee named Shmee, which I’ve always considered to be a sister sketch to Egg Man. I wonder if both sketches were written by the same person. Jack Handey, perhaps?
STARS: ***½


REALLY ORDINARY PEOPLE
average-seekers (host) & (KEN) enjoy their run-of-the-mill blind date

— Took me a while to see where this is going. I’m not too crazy about this premise of Kevin and Kathleen’s friendly pointing-out of the other’s averageness.
— Okay, I did get a good laugh from Kevin’s line about how he likes to crank his radio up to about 5.
— This ended on kind of a weird, empty note.
— This sketch as a whole didn’t work much for me. A rare misfire for Kevin Nealon.
STARS: **


ALL ABOUT DEBORAH NORVILLE
Jane Pauley (JAH) faces competition

— I got a good laugh from how Kathleen-as-Deborah-Norville’s increasingly nervous speaking to Jan’s Jane Pauley eventually devolved to her saying “You good, me bad.”
— Love Jon’s hilarious look as Gene Shalit.
— Could SNL have found a black extra who looks any LESS like Bryant Gumbel? (fourth screencap above) At least this serves as a happy reminder that this is thankfully the final season where SNL doesn’t have any black cast members.
— I feel kinda lost on the topicality of this sketch, but I’m getting a lot of enjoyment anyway, for the solid writing and very committed performances from Kathleen and Jan.
STARS: ****


LANK THOMPSON: I’M A HANDSOME MAN
Lank Thompson (MIM) plugs his “I’m A Handsome Man” course

— Good characterization from Mike here, and I love that cheesy smile he does at the end of every mini-scene.
— An overall pretty good debut of this soon-to-be-recurring sketch, though I like some of its later installments better (e.g. the ones with Alec Baldwin and Tim Meadows, respectively).
STARS: ***


555-TOON
phone sex from Jessica Rabbit (host) & other animated babes

— An amusingly clever naughty use of Kathleen’s Jessica Rabbit voice.
— The Flintstones ending was funny.
STARS: ***½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Downeaster Alexa”


MAXWELL HOUSE
Linda Ellerbee (NOD) & Willard Scott (JOL) do final ad for Maxwell House

— Hearing the opening Maxwell House sound effect jingle (those rhythmic boink-type sounds) was a blast from the past for me, reminding me of frequently seeing those Maxwell House commercials during my childhood.
— Hmm, I have no memory of Linda Ellerbee ever being a Maxwell House spokesperson.
— Jon is absolutely PRICELESS as a goofy, bare-bellied, Hawaiian outfit-wearing, hula-dancing Willard Scott.
— This is another sketch tonight that seems to be based on a topical story that I have no familiarity with, but Jon’s performance alone is making this sketch for me.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— A mostly good episode. There were a few misfires, but not enough to drag down the quality of the show too badly or anything.


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Rick Moranis)
a slight step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
James Woods

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January 12, 1985 – Kathleen Turner / John Waite (S10 E10)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

COLD OPENING
in Donahue green room, Fernando asks Bernie Goetz (RIH) to be on Hideaway

— Yet another Fernando sketch, though at least he’s in a new setting this time. Still, there’s only so much of this character I can take.
— I do kinda like his excitement over the green room having “two midget transvestites and a nazi!”
— Some of his comments to the dwarf transvestites (played by frequent Ebersol-era extras Butch and Pepe) are pretty funny.
— Funny seeing Rich as the infamous Bernard Goetz (a.k.a. The Subway Vigilante).
— When talking about how rough things have been going for his show lately, Fernando makes a reference to the recent Manilow cancellation incident.
— The tense part with Fernando asking Goetz for a quarter is a good reference, though probably too topical for the modern-day viewers who have no familiarity with Goetz’s subway incident.
STARS: **½


MONOLOGUE
pictures of host’s movie roles show a trend of increasing sexiness

— As she points out, she’s the first female host of the season, which is pretty crazy considering we’re halfway through the season. Even stranger, I think this season goes on to have only one more female host (Pamela Sue Martin). This has to be an all-time record for lowest number of female hosts in a single season.
— The mud-in-hair/brunette joke was terrible.
— She calls out Jack Nicholson in the audience, who turns out to be some random curly-haired guy. A decent gag, I guess, though I feel like SNL did a similar gag one other time (can’t remember when).
— Uh-oh, looks like this is turning into another boring “career photo montage” monologue from this season.
— Yep, I was right, unfortunately.
STARS: **


MACDOUGLASS-DRUMMOND
military supplier MacDouglass-Drummond’s products are basic yet costly

— I’m surprised this is the first time this season that we’re seeing Harry in a commercial pitchman role, considering how often he did these roles to perfection during his earlier stint in season 5. It’s great to see him back in this role.
— Loved Harry’s “But, wait, there’s less!” line
— Another great one-liner, with Harry’s fast-paced delivery of “It boils, it boils, it even boils!”
— An overall strong and smart satirical ad.
STARS: ****


WATERSKIING
Willie & Frankie talk about pain while taking part in a water-ski pyramid

— I love this very random setting for Willie and Frankie.
— I like the continuity of how these sketches always make a mention of the secretary at Sheidelman Suits who Billy’s character has the hots for.
— Nice reveal at the end when the camera pulls back and shows how this sketch was pulled off.
— Hate to say it because I usually really like these characters, but the formula of their sketches is starting to get stale due to how heavily SNL has been relying on these. None of Willie and Frankie’s gruesome stories stood out in tonight’s overall sketch, and quite a number of their stories kinda washed over me with me just chuckling at them by default.
STARS: **½


NOSE HAIR TRIMMER
nose hair trimmer Walter sells (CHG) on importance of groomed nostrils

— Always nice to see Gary’s underrated Walter character.
— This appears to be a variation of Walter’s “shoe tier” sketch from last season’s Flip Wilson episode, only this time, Walter’s bizarre occupation is “nose hair trimmer”. I’m loving this strange concept.
— Christopher appears to be playing the same character he played in the Jewish Deli sketch in the last episode.
— LOL at Billy’s walk-on with long, braided nose hairs.
— Absolutely hilarious ending with Rich casually walking by and tripping over Christopher’s (invisible) long nose hair that Walter is pulling, sending all three men crashing onto the ground.
STARS: ***½


SAFECO
Joan Collins (PLS) proves the strength of Dura Guard II plate glass

— Pamela is perfectly cast as Joan Collins.
— Pretty funny concept of a plate glass company using Joan Collins as battering ram against her will.
— This overall commercial didn’t end up playing out quite as funny as I was expecting.
STARS: **½


HYPNOTISM BY FIRE
to ensure daughter’s safety, Brad Allen (MAS) hypnotizes boyfriend (BIC)

— Pretty funny detailed look for Martin’s character, giving him a huge belly, bald cap, and glasses.
— Some good physical work from Martin throughout this.
— Holy hell, Billy’s wig almost came right off after Martin smacked the back of his head a second time.
— Haha, Billy’s now-uneven wig looks ridiculous.
— While talking to Martin and Julia, Billy stops mid-line as the audience keeps laughing hysterically at his uneven wig. He doesn’t seem to realize what the heck is going on until Martin and a chuckling Julia both adjust his wig for him, which causes him to crack up. An absolutely fantastic blooper here.
— Also, we get some really good back-and-forth ad-libs from Martin and Billy right afterwards.
— For some reason, I laughed at Mary’s off-camera delivery of “Nooooooo!” when asked if she’s going to come downstairs.
— An overall mostly forgettable and overlong sketch that was boosted by a classic blooper.
STARS: **½


PREDICTIONS
Jeane Dixon (MAG) tells what the stars predict for 1985

— Mary looks kinda freaky in this. Her facial expressions are kinda creeping me out.
— I’m pretty sure I just heard the voice of Larry David playing yet another off-camera heckler, this time as a guy who yells “That already happened!” in response to Mary’s Elvis prediction. I guess even back in 1984-85, SNL saw the comedic potential in Larry David’s shouty voice.
— I liked Mary casually pronouncing “holocaust” as “holycoast”, as a clever callback to her preceding prediction that a celebrity will mispronounce “holocaust” and not be aware of it.
— Interesting meta bit with Mary predicting host Kathleen Turner’s mind will wander in the next sketch.
— Overall, despite Mary giving her all, this wasn’t too great and quite a number of the predictions fell kinda flat.
STARS: **½


THE JOE FRANKLIN SHOW
Doug Henning (MAS) & Alan Arkin (CHG)

 

— The initial sight of Martin as a buckthoothed Doug Henning cracked me up.
— I’m enjoying Christopher’s Alan Arkin voice and general grumpiness.
— I like how in these sketches, Billy’s Joe Franklin always has to work in a plug for Matzos by Streit’s.
— Kathleen’s bad lip-syncing of her own song is funny.
— Overall, another good Joe Franklin sketch, and each performer got their share of laughs. Lately, I’ve been appreciating these Franklin sketches more than I used to when I was younger, back when I dismissed these sketches as being kinda boring.
STARS: ***½


BOXER
punchy retired boxer Tony Minetti (BIC) reminisces while vending peanuts

— OH, NO. Here’s our second Billy Crystal one-man-show character monologue of the season. I’ve already talked earlier this season about how much I dislike these.
— Also, man, tonight’s episode has been going REALLY heavy on Billy Crystal. Aside from the MacDouglass-Drummond and Predictions sketches, Billy has been in literally EVERY SINGLE SKETCH in this episode so far, and almost all of his appearances have been lead roles.
— I did get one chuckle so far, from the line about a boxer starting to bleed at the weigh-in.
— Overall, aside from the above-mentioned line, I got absolutely no laughs from this sketch. This was even worse than the one-man-show character piece Billy did earlier this season.
STARS: *½


FAST LOVE
maneater (host) manipulates jilted (MAS) into pursuing a relationship

— Funny part with Kathleen implying she’s a multi-orgasmic woman.
— I like the overly 80s look of the various party-goers. You’d almost think this was a modern-day piece set in the 80s, judging by how stereotypically 80s so many people in this sketch are dressed.
— Speaking of which, it’s funny how a plain-dressed Larry David (in yet another background extra role this season) sticks out like a sore thumb among the trendily-dressed background extras.
— Kathleen’s out-of-nowhere “Lucky for you, I’m ovulating tonight” was hilarious.
— An overall pretty nice, realistic piece.
STARS: ***


SATURDAY NIGHT NEWS
a summary of recent appointments to Reagan administration posts
GAK shows off his 1985 “Kroeger A Month” beefcake calendar
Reagan financial advisor Doug Henning (RIH) makes CHG cough up some dough

— I see this is yet ANOTHER episode this season where Saturday Night News is oddly buried towards the end of the show [ADDENDUM: And yes, this is how the episode originally aired], which serves as more evidence of Ebersol’s diminishing confidence in the segment.
— The rundown of which White House staff members are being replaced with which celebrities has some laughs, but the bit is too long-winded for my likes. Brings back bad memories of the overlong bits Brian Doyle-Murray regularly did on SNL Newsbreak back in season 7.
— Very funny concept of Gary’s commentary, with him showcasing his self-made “Kroeger A Month” beefcake calendar for the year 1985.
— Funny calendar pictures of Gary here, and some good little self-deprecating lines thrown in throughout this.
— Christopher actually made me laugh, with his deadpan “That’s very sad” response to Gary’s overall commentary.
— Rich Hall takes over the Doug Henning impression that we had just seen Martin Short playing earlier tonight, making this a rare instance of two different performers playing the same celebrity in two separate sketches in the same episode.
— Rich makes a meta comment about what I just pointed out above, by commenting how it’s “amazing that there are two Doug Hennings on this show”.
— Haha, Rich’s fake buck teeth fell out!
— Nice save with Christopher handing Rich a spare pair of fake buck teeth.
— Rich’s Henning getting Christopher to magically cough up money into the bucket is pretty funny. Not sure how that trick was pulled off in real life.
— What was with the ending of this edition of Saturday Night News? Christopher didn’t even sign off. It just ended with the audience’s applause after Rich’s Henning commentary was over, as Christopher just silently stares at the camera completely deadpan. WTF?
STARS: **½


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Saturday Night”


STRICTLY FROM BLACKWELL
(MAS) in dinner theater version of Irma La Douce

— What’s with the oddly silent beginning during the “Strictly From Blackwell” title screen?
— I liked Harry’s random line about “the James Franciscus Theater”.
— Hmm, Martin’s character is named Bobby Bouchet (last name pronounced “boo-SHAY”). Heh, isn’t that the same name of Adam Sandler’s character in the movie The Waterboy?
— As usual, Harry’s Mr. Blackwell voice is cracking me up, and there are lots of low-key funny back-and-forths between him and Martin.
— Martin’s reveal that his biological parents are JFK and Marilyn Monroe is really funny.
— Pretty solid sketch overall.
— Unfortunately, this turns out to be the end of the road for Harry Shearer’s second SNL tenure. After this episode, Dick Ebersol fires him for a backstage incident that happened earlier that night after dress rehearsal, where Harry reduced a beloved female staffer to tears when chewing her out over a minor issue. Harry had a reputation for being too demanding and stern behind the scenes at SNL, and I guess the aforementioned incident was the final straw for Ebersol. This makes Harry the second cast member to be fired in the middle of this season ALONE. Boy, Ebersol sure doesn’t play around. However, unlike the first fired cast member this season (Jim Belushi), Harry doesn’t eventually get rehired. He’s gone for good, folks. Considering how much he famously hated working at SNL, he probably wouldn’t have wanted to get rehired anyway. Too bad, as I’ve always loved what he brought to the show during both his SNL stints (seasons 5 and 10).
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS

IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS:
— An overall disappointing episode, especially when compared to the usual quality this season. I did like the memorable bloopers tonight (Billy Crystal’s wig in Hypnotism By Fire, Rich Hall’s fake buck teeth in Saturday Night News), but the show was dominated by lots of forgettable sketches. Aside from the two Harry Shearer sketches, no segments stood out as particularly great tonight. This episode was also too heavy on Billy Crystal for my likes, with him receiving Kristen Wiig levels of overexposure.
— Strange scheduling tonight too, with Saturday Night News and John Waite’s first (and ONLY) musical performance not coming on until the last 20 minutes of the show. I wouldn’t be surprised if a second musical performance was originally scheduled but ended up getting cut at the last minute due to the show running long. Maybe it was all the aforementioned bloopers that threw off the scheduling of the show.


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Eddie Murphy):
— a big step down


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW:
Roy Scheider