January 21, 1989 – John Malkovich / Anita Baker (S14 E10)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

COLD OPENING
Ronald Reagan (PHH) interrupts George Bush’s (DAC) Super Bowl XXIII call

— We’ve officially arrived at a new presidency during SNL’s timeline.
— Pretty funny with Bush’s phone call getting interrupted by the now-former President Reagan.
— I like Reagan repeating the same corny “We could use your players on Capitol Hill” joke that Bush already told earlier.
— Reagan’s confused stammering is making me laugh, due to Phil’s delivery.
— Reagan, on why he should be the president to call the Super Bowl winners: “I guess I thought that since I was president during the SEASON and the playoffs, I was supposed to…”
STARS: ***


OPENING MONTAGE
— Mike Myers is added to the cast as a featured player.


MONOLOGUE
(no synopsis available)

— Malkovich: “I’m John Malkovich, and these are my own clothes.”
— I got a big laugh from him randomly mentioning that his hometown of Benton, Illinois is right by a place where there was a big murder in a trailer park a few years earlier.
— Some really good laughs from the recollections of his grandmother’s criticism of his film work. I especially liked the part about her telling him “You need a wig like Pavarotti.”
— I’m absolutely loving Malkovich’s dry delivery in this monologue.
— Another great dryly-delivered line, this time regarding how Empire Of The Sun was directed by “the Jewish boy” Stephen Spielberg.
STARS: ****


FIRST CITIWIDE CHANGE BANK
— Rerun


BARBARA & NANCY
Barbara Bush (PHH) tries to get Nancy Reagan (JAH) out of the White House

— I like this premise of a meeting between the about-to-be-former first lady and about-to-be-current first lady.
— A good laugh from Barbara’s friendly-but-eager delivery of “When does your plane leave?” to Nancy.
— Some great humor out of Nancy’s desperation in staying and Barbara’s desperation in getting Nancy the hell out.
— Classic visual of Nancy having to be literally dragged out of the room as she grabs on to everything she can.
— The first time I ever saw this sketch, in (I think) Phil’s “Best Of” special back when I wasn’t too familiar with this SNL era, it was the first time I started to take notice of Jan. As the sketch ended, I remember wondering who the woman was who gave that great performance as Nancy Reagan. Though as much as I remember liking Jan’s performance in this, that’s not what turned me into a fan of hers. That wouldn’t happen until sometime later on when I saw a Comedy Central airing of the Alec Baldwin episode from season 15. If you’re familiar with that episode, you’ll understand why it turned me into a Jan Hooks fan. I’ll go into a little more detail when we reach that episode.
STARS: ****½


FIRST CITIWIDE CHANGE BANK
— Another rerun.
— After laughing hysterically at Part 1 of this ad earlier tonight, tonight’s audience is oddly dead silent during this one. What’s up with that?


ATTITUDES
an interview with driftwood sculptor Len Tukwilla (host)

— I’m enjoying how late 80s the look and feel of this whole sketch is.
— Great characterizations from Jan and Nora here. Lots of funny little touches in their performances.
— Love the name Len Tukwilla. It’s funny little details like that that help make this sketch so fantastic.
— Malkovich’s explanation of how he sculpts squirrels nests is really funny, as is Jan and Nora’s attempts to make their mundane questions to him seem so exciting.
— Malkovich: “It’s a very, very painstaking process; it doesn’t just happen overnight… unless you work on it all night long.”
— I’m loving how Malkovich is now giving so many blunt “no” answers to most of Jan and Nora’s questions.
STARS: ****½


GARY BUSEY MOTORCYCLE HELMETS
Gary Busey’s (PHH) motorcycle helmets have their own protection devices

— Pretty funny Busey impression from Phil.
— Decent gag with the increasingly oversized helmet protectors.
— Good ending visual of Phil’s Busey riding the motorcycle while trying not to tip over due to his big helmet.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest sings “Giving You The Best That I Got”


YOU MOCK ME
Lord Edmund (host) lets it be known- he will not be mocked

— The close-up of Malkovich silently turning his deadpan face towards Jan and then uttering his first “You mock me” tickled the hell out of me. Maybe it’s because I know what’s coming.
— Love Malkovich running to the door after Jan has exited from it, just to yell at her “AND I WILL NOT BE MOCKED!!!”
— Lovitz and Dana’s foppish mocking gestures behind Malkovich’s back are freakin’ priceless.
— Mike Myers makes his debut! It feels very exciting seeing a new cast member at this point, for the same reason it felt exciting for me to cover Bill Murray and Harry Shearer’s respective debuts when I reviewed the original era: when you watch/review SNL episodes in chronological order on a daily basis and get very used to a steady, unchanging cast, it feels both unusual and refreshing seeing somebody new being added to your familiar cast. That’s one of the many reasons I started this SNL project of mine: I knew it would be exciting to experience SNL’s evolutionary changes while going through their timeline daily.
— Fitting that Mike Myers is doing an English accent in his very first appearance, considering we’re going to be hearing that type of accent (as well as other U.K. accents) a lot from him throughout his SNL tenure.
— On paper, this sketch may come off repetitive, but the performances are selling the hell out of the material, and are elevating it to a hilarious, very memorable piece.
— Lovitz and Dana are particularly hilarious at the end of the sketch with their extended, over-the-top imitations of Malkovich’s character. I also love how that’s accompanied by the camera slowly zooming in on an unamused Malkovich just watching them while having a stone-faced expression.
STARS: *****


WEEKEND UPDATE
Sandra Day O’Connor (JAH) swears in Dan Quayle (DAC) syllable-by-syllable
DEM narrates a retrospective consisting of ho-hum photos of Ronald Reagan
AWB disapproves of the overspending on George Bush’s inauguration

 

— Pretty funny sequence with Dana as Dan Quayle being sworn in, especially when it gets to the point where Jan tries to make it easier on him by having him repeat the oath one word at a time (there’s also some really funny stock footage cutaways accompanying that part).
— While not all that funny, the retrospective of Reagan’s presidency was actually strangely touching in a way.
— I liked the callback to Dennis’ Bucketman joke from the last Update.
— A. Whitney, on Bush’s inauguration: “There were eleven inaugural balls. Now, some people would say that’s a little excessive. But, you know, it TAKES a lot of balls to throw a 30 million dollar celebration before you’ve even done anything.”
— A. Whitney, on the 200th anniversary of the presidency: “We’ve gone from ‘I cannot tell a lie’ to ‘I cannot tell’.”
— Dennis’ jokes have been more hit-and-miss than usual. He’s leaning awfully heavy on corny photo-based jokes tonight.
— If you know me, you’ll know I got a kick out of Dennis’ random Three Stooges Missile joke.
STARS: ***


CALIFORNIA CONDOR
at a cookout, guys try to put a hurt California condor out of its misery

— I like the bizarre visual of a dying mechanical bird puppet.
— Clever ending with the “California Condor Released Today” headline.
— The randomness of this overall sketch and the use of a mechanical animal puppet makes me wonder if this was a Jack Handey piece.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest sings “Just Because”


JOHNNY CANAL
Johnny Canal (host) tries to sell James Monroe (PHH) on waterways

— Wow, I love that theme song.
— Now THIS is undoubtedly a Jack Handey sketch, as this features the very first instance of the “fake sponsors” gag that would go on to be a tradition in some of his sketches. There’s an especially funny sponsor tonight with the Atlantic Puppy Grinding Company (“Maybe it’s evil, but think of the jobs!”).
— Malkovich demonstrating on a map his absurd idea of canals running all over the country is very funny.
— A great, amusing touch with the camera slowly zooming in on Malkovich’s dumbfounded face when Phil is listing off all the flaws in Malkovich’s plan.
— Hilarious repeated gag with Malkovich responding to any question he doesn’t know the answer to by leaping onto the table and lunging at the question-asker with a knife. Part of what makes that so funny is the long pause Malkovich always does before leaping.
— I like Malkovich’s asinine explanation of how he got the name Johnny Canal.
— In the rerun version I’m watching, the audience applauds during the ending bit with Malkovich lunging at Phil with a knife. I’m thinking that must be canned applause, because I swear I remember once seeing a copy of the live version of this sketch where, IIRC, that ending bit with Malkovich lunging at Phil with a knife played to DEAD SILENCE from the audience, which, to be honest, actually made it even funnier to me in an odd way.
— I absolutely loved this overall sketch.
STARS: ****½


TALK RADIO
deejay Tony Trailer (KEN) talks annoyingly over radio station’s music

— Pretty basic premise, but it’s being executed well, is a funny parody of radio announcers annoyingly talking over songs, and is one of the types of roles that’s right in Kevin’s wheelhouse.
— I liked Lovitz as the aggressive caller asking Kevin to shut up while his favorite song (Louis Armstrong’s “What a Wonderful World”) is playing.
STARS: ***½


GOODNIGHTS

— Malkovich: “I never thought I’d get to work with Jon Lovitz… and I hope I never will again. The man is a pig… and a menace.”


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS
— Fantastic episode. I loved almost everything in it. So many strong, memorable sketches, and nothing fell flat for me. John Malkovich was excellent tonight (even his goodnights speech was funny, as seen in the above quote) and he would go on to become one of my favorite semi-recurring hosts (his 1993 hosting stint in particular has always been one of my personal favorite episodes of all-time).


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Melanie Griffith)
a big step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW
Tony Danza

April 11, 1987 – John Lithgow / Anita Baker (S12 E16)

Segments are rated on a scale of 1-5 stars

COLD OPENING
stupid Marines (DAC) & (KEN) let spies into the USA embassy in Moscow

— Dana and Kevin’s excitement over getting some “fine soviet fur tonight” is hilarious.
— For some reason, this doesn’t feel like a cold opening I’m watching.
— I like Dana and Kevin’s obliviousness to the fact that they’re among spies.
— Nice to see a rare instance of a host appearing in the cold opening, though it makes this feel even more like I’m not watching a cold opening.
— I like how Lithgow has gotten to say “Live from New York…” in both episodes he’s hosted so far.
— An overall pretty good sketch, but felt kinda strange as a cold opening. Perhaps this was based on a news story at the time, which I guess would explain its placement as the cold opening (though I’m well aware that not every cold opening back in these days had to be political or topical, which is more than I can say for SNL nowadays).
STARS: ***


MONOLOGUE
a too-low boom mike blows the show’s chances of winning a Benchley award

— Some good laughs from Lithgow’s giddiness about this episode being up for a Benchley Award.
— Love his slowburn after the boom mic ruined the shot (“There goes the award-winning John Lithgow show!”), eventually getting so upset he works himself into an anxiety attack.
— An overall solid monologue that was perfect for John Lithgow. He’s great at pulling off a gradual reaction to something, like his last monologue when he had a slow descent into horror when realizing he’s on the air live and is not at dress rehearsal.
STARS: ****


ADOBE
— Rerun
[ADDENDUM: According to episode guides, this wasn’t even in the original airing of this episode. Was this added into reruns to replace something that got removed? All the originally-aired segments in this episode seem to be intact in the rerun version, judging from the episode guides.]


REVEREND DWIGHT HENDERSON, WORLD’S MEANEST METHODIST MINISTER
(host) is World’s Meanest Methodist Minister

— This is already a funny concept, and seems perfect for Lithgow.
— Only John Lithgow could make the sarcastically-delivered line “Enjoy your turkey and Cheez Whiz” sound so damn funny.
— I like him having the married couple dismissed from his office simply because their marital problems isn’t a subject that interests him.
— Nice touch with Lithgow and his visitors being separated by a pole barrier.
— LOL at Lithgow doing the imaginary violin miming during Jan’s sad story.
— I liked Nora’s line that ends with her calling Lithgow a “butthole”.
— The ending came off pretty weak.
STARS: ***


MASTER THESPIAN
Baudelaire teaches his protege how to replace Olivier

— Glad to see this in tonight’s show, as the best Master Thespians are always the ones with Lithgow’s Baudelaire character.
— I got a laugh from Lithgow’s throwaway line about a “question du jour”.
— I really liked Master Thespian trying to outdo Baudelaire by doing the “there’s a spot on your shirt” trick on himself.
— Overall, a strong sketch as expected. Lithgow is so perfect for these sketches, and it’s so much fun to watch him and Lovitz play off of each other in these.
STARS: ****


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Sweet Love”


THE PAT STEVENS SHOW
Halston’s (PHH) name doesn’t mean what it used to

— Well, I guess I can’t complain much about seeing this again, considering they’ve really cut back on the number of these Pat Stevens sketches this season. We’re pretty much in the homestretch of season 12, and this is only the third time Pat Stevens has appeared all season. Compare this to season 11, where Pat Stevens was in about 60% of the episodes.
— What’s with the faint tinkly music I keep hearing in the background while Pat’s addressing the viewers?
— Good characterization from Phil.
— Some laughs from the cheap products that Halston’s name is now on.
— Overall, this had its moments, but ehh, I’m still feeling a little burned out on the humor of these sketches.
STARS: **½


WEEKEND UPDATE
KEN’s editorial on surrogate motherhood is sprinkled with cliches
AWB questions the values underlying the Baby M case

— Looks like this is going to be yet another Kevin Nealon commentary where he constantly changes subjects.
— Kevin’s overall commentary had some funny lines, but these subject-changing commentaries of his have slowly been losing their luster for me lately.
— Okay, what the HELL just happened? As Dennis pulled out a pair of Jim Bakker brand shorts, audio suddenly played of somebody announcing “The winner is Paul Newman”, which is followed by the sound of a crowd applauding, then the audio suddenly gets cut off. Dennis looks a bit perplexed for a second, and then amusedly responds in a head-shaking kind of way “That Betty”. What in the world?!? Was that whole thing some kind of reference to that year’s then-recent Oscars? A non-sequitur? Was the “Betty” that Dennis referred to Bette Davis? Why was that audio played during a completely unrelated bit about Jim Bakker’s clothing line of shorts? Was that some kind of bizarre technical error? So many questions…
— A. Whitney’s commentary is already stating off with strong with his “masturbating into a cup” comments, even if I had no idea what that was referring to until he soon made it clear it’s a reference to a topical news story.
— A. Whitney’s overall commentary was particularly good. Probably one of his best so far.
STARS: ***½


LARAMIE VICE
Crockett (host) & Tubbs (KEN) smell drugs in the Wild West

— Dennis’ attempt at an Old West accent is hilariously bad. A. Whitney’s attempt, on the other hand, is surprisingly strong.
— Another Miami Vice parody. Ehh, I’m not too eager to see one after the awful Cleveland Vice sketch from the previous season.
— At least the opening credits sequence didn’t go on forever like Cleveland Vice’s opening did. I also liked the detail of Kevin Nealon being credited as “Kevin Michael Nealon”, ala Phillip Michael Thomas.
— Love Phil’s gravelly voice.
— Dana’s Scarface-esque performance is hilarious.
— Clever detail with the “Mary Todd Lincoln Rehab Center”, as an old-timey version of the Betty Ford Clinic.
— My biggest laugh of the whole sketch didn’t come until the very end, during the “preview of next week’s episode” scene where Lithgow badly lip-syncs to Don Johnson’s “Heartbeat” with a hilarious intense look on his face (second-to-last screencap above). I also got a huge laugh from the ensuing shot, where Dana getting impaled by a bull is pulled off VERY poorly with an extremely cheap-looking effect.
— Overall, while I enjoyed this more than the Cleveland Vice sketch, this still was nothing great as a whole. I’m thinking SNL needs to stay away from doing extensive, long-winded Miami Vice parodies. They’re 0-for-2 so far.
— IIRC, this sketch was originally placed as the post-monologue lead-off sketch during the original live airing. I can see why they pushed this into a much later timeslot in the rerun version I’m reviewing.
STARS: **½


DISCOVER
Peter Graves (PHH) doesn’t really comprehend bacteria

— Phil-as-Graves’ bad similes are cracking me up, especially the comparison between invisible bacteria and Heather Thomas’ breasts.
— Funny part with Phil’s Graves randomly getting caught inhaling from a gas tube.
— Overall, this was solid, but doesn’t quite compare to the classic first installment from earlier this season.
STARS: ****


THE FIGHTER
wealthy (PHH) hires washed-up boxer (host) to hit son (DAC)

— Good to see yet another black-and-white sketch this season.
— They seem to be going for even more authenticity than usual in this one, using a grainy visual effect that makes this look exactly like something from the early days of TV.
— Particularly good delivery from Nora in this.
— I remember a review I once read of this episode pointed out how Dana seemed to be doing a Jon Lovitz impression in this sketch. It’s true. The voice Dana is using as Phil’s son is eerily Lovitz-esque. So much so, that there’s no way that WASN’T intentional. Must’ve been some kind of inside joke between Dana and Jon.
STARS: ***


MUSICAL PERFORMANCE
musical guest performs “Same Ole Love”


CROSS COUNTRY
cab driver (host) gets (JOL) from New York to San Francisco in 9 minutes

— Of the last three episodes, this is the second to end with a taxi sketch.
— I like how a mere $20 bill convinces Lithgow to do the ridiculous task of driving all the way to San Francisco.
— Very funny greensceen effect of the taxi driving insanely fast. I like how the greenscreen is randomly using black-and-white stock scenery.
— Also a very funny use of a model toy car to represent weather changes the taxi is driving through.
— Good ending with Lithgow beginning to head all the way back to Lovitz’s home just because Lovitz forgot his wedding ring.
— Very fun overall sketch that I’ve always loved.
STARS: ****½


GOODNIGHTS


IMMEDIATE POST-SHOW THOUGHTS:
— Fun episode. While not perfect, I got a lot of enjoyment from the show as a whole, and the presence of John Lithgow certainly helped. He is now 2-for-2 in solid episodes.


HOW THIS EPISODE STACKS UP AGAINST THE PRECEDING ONE (Charlton Heston):
— a moderate step up


My full set of screencaps for this episode is here


TOMORROW:

John Larroquette, our second consecutive host named John L.